Page 48 of Burn Bag

“Well, there was the time he passed out next to a mummy. That was pretty fucking hilarious.”

I paled at his words, swallowing hard, but pushed it aside. There would be another time to think about that.

“Oh, and then he had to jump out of the plane with the mummy, or something like that. And then the locusts showed up.” He started chuckling. “And then Eli sent him a scarab.”

“A what?”

“Ancient bug. It had some death note with it. Scared the shit out of Kavanaugh,” he laughed.

“I thought you all liked him,” I glowered.

“Well, yeah, but we also like to fuck with each other.”

Okay, yes, it was funny, but it would definitely not help my situation.

“Don’t worry, honey. I’m sure his little John will be just fine in a few weeks.”

My eyes bugged out at his words. “Weeks?”

A low chuckle left his lips as he glanced over at me. “He’ll probably be a little gun shy. Here we go,” he said cheerily as we pulled into the ER.

I jumped out, twisting my hands as FNG hauled Bradley out of the back and tossed him over his shoulder once again. This was so bad. What would they think of me when they found out what happened?

Mauled by cats.

“Shouldn’t he have woken up by now?” I asked as FNG carried him inside.

“Sometimes trauma keeps your brain in a sedated state to prevent you from reliving the events. Probably best in this situation.”

I rushed over to the desk, trying in vain to explain the situation to the lady behind the desk, but she didn’t seem to care at all. Based on the bored expression on her face, he could have come in on death’s door and it would just be another Tuesday for her.

“Fill out this paperwork,” she said, sliding a clipboard across to me.

My eyes widened in horror at the mountain of paperwork that had to be taken care of. “Um…see, the thing is, I just married him. I don’t actually know any of this information.”

She stared at me incredulously. “You married him, but you can’t give me any information,” she repeated.

My phone rang in my pocket and I pulled it out, glancing at the screen. It was my mother. Now was not the time to talk to her. What would I even say?Hey, Mom. I just got married to a man I never met until I walked down the aisle. But don’t worry. He’s exactly what you would want for your baby girl, and now he’s in the hospital because he was mauled by cats I stole.Yeah, that would go over really well.

I shoved my phone back in my pocket and focused on things I could deal with right now. Like explaining to the nurse what I knew I wouldn’t be able to explain to my parents.

“Well…” I looked at the form again and beamed. “His name is Bradford William Kavanaugh!”

She stared at me for a beat. “Great. That answers all the really important questions.”

She snatched the forms back and went back to ignoring me. I might possibly be the worst wife on the face of the planet, but it wasn’t entirely my fault. How could I be expected to know everythingabout the man I married when I’d only known him for a couple of days? And half of those, I was drunk.

I paced the waiting room for a good hour, waiting for any word from the doctor. Seriously, this should not be taking so long. Did they have to amputate or something?

I covered my mouth as I considered the possibility. It couldn’t be. There was no way. Then again, I wasn’t entirely sure what they had done to the kittens before I rescued them. What if they carried some horrible disease? What if his dick fell off? It would all be my fault. I would officially be the worst wife ever.

The doors whooshed open behind me and a familiar-looking woman strode in, her strawberry blonde hair perfectly coifed framing her beautiful pale skin.

And she was staring at me like she wanted to murder me. Suddenly, I remembered where I’d seen her. This was the woman who cornered me in the bathroom at the wedding. She appeared kind on the outside, but inside, a demon lurked, waiting to kill me.

Walking right up to the front desk like she owned the place, the woman behind the counter gave her all her attention.

“Yes, I’m Isla Thorne. I got a call about Bradford Kavanaugh?”

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