Page 31 of The Pieces We've Lost

We had just met and we were friends, nothing more. Shit like this happened all the time. It was normal. We talked a couple times but ultimately we wouldn’t be right for each other, even as friends, so I cut him loose. So why did I feel like I had made a mistake?

I could practically hear Isa’s voice in my ear,“That’s because it was a mistake, you idiot. You clearly had a good thing, great even, but then you pushed him away like you always do. What are you so damn afraid of?”

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

colter

Igot out of Ellison’s car and gave her one more look before getting in my truck and watching her peel out of the parking lot. I shouldn’t have felt so disappointed by her comment. After all, we weren’t together—hell, we had only gone on two dates. But I thought I was getting somewhere, especially with her opening up about her father and showing me the pickup, something she had never told anyone else about.

I didn’t want to keep bothering her if that was how she really felt, but part of me didn’t believe her when she said it was for the best. A wave of embarrassment came over me, as I thought about how many times she had rejected me. It reminded me of Sophie, and the deep fear of not being enough threatened to resurface and drag me back down with it. Stressing over it wasn’t going to help me, though. I was conflicted between letting go—giving her the choice to come to me if she wanted to—and refusing to let my fear overtake what could be a good thing for both of us.

I had six days before the first semifinal round and nine days before I left Houston. It was both plenty of time andno time at all. I was going to prove to Ellison that whatever we had would be worth it; this cowboy wasn’t just going to ride away in the end. Whether she believed me or not was out of my hands.

Reid and Aaron were already waiting for me. I was only a little bit late. I hadn’t realized how much time had passed when I was with Ellison. What had seemed like minutes of talking was actually a few hours, and it was already almost five o’clock.

The plan was to go to dinner, but since I had already eaten a late lunch, they decided they wanted to go to a hole-in-the-wall bar, away from downtown Houston. Aaron wanted to catch up with us, maybe grab a beer or two, and then go to the rodeo with his family.

“Oh look, it’s the man of the hour. Nice of you to show up.” Aaron winked as I walked up to the table they were sitting at.

“Sorry, guys. I was out doing some things.” I gave as vague an answer as possible. Reid kind of knew what was going on but he didn’t know everything.

“Well, I’m glad you made it anyway. So listen, you boys were two of our school’s best. Coachable, talented, not to mention you went on to have a great start to your career.”

Here it was. The real reason why Aaron had wanted to get together. He no doubt wanted us to think about coming back to Sapphire Gulch University to coach.

“Athletics and I were talking about the future. Don’t look so scared, Colter. I’m not asking you to give up your career. Yet.” He chuckled as heat rose to my cheeks. “I know it’s too early to think seriously about coaching, buthow would you two feel about coming back this fall to do some clinics with the team and maybe also some youngsters in the community?”

Clinics? Huh, that was not what I was expecting. That was easy. Go over to Goldfinch for a couple of weekends in the fall, help teach kids the proper techniques, and then get back on the road again.

“That sounds great, Aaron.” Reid nodded enthusiastically. He had always been more of a teacher than I was. It came naturally to him from taking care of his younger siblings. Not that I didn’t love working with kids, but they could be a lot sometimes and I didn’t know if I was the best teacher.

“Colter? What do you think?”

Honestly, I wasn’t sure. But it was a great opportunity to give back to the community that had given us so much during our college careers. It would be foolish to say no to the man who had done so much for us.

“All right, I’ll help you out, old man,” I joked with him.

He gave me a look of mock offense, but it was fleeting. “Thank you boys. I, and the team, appreciate it more than you’ll ever know.”

We spent the next thirty minutes or so chatting about life. Aaron’s oldest, Mason, was in middle school and his youngest, Mackinley, had started fourth grade. I remembered when his daughter was only a toddler and he’d bring her around to practices, carrying her on his shoulders. I knew I wanted that someday, even if I didn’t know how to handle kids right now.

“All right, boys, thanks for this chat. It was great to see you, and good luck out there. I’d better get back to my family or my wife will have my head.” Aaron waved goodbye.

Once he had left, Reid turned to me with an expression I couldn’t read. “What’s going on with you, Colt?” he asked, the concern evident in his voice. “You seem distracted.”

“Nothing’s going on,” I lied.

“Come on, Colt, I know when you’re lying. Your face does this stupid twitching thing. Is this about that girl?”

“We almost kissed and then your dumb ass called me. She said it was nothing and probably for the best that we didn’t.” I shrugged. I was downplaying how I felt, big time. Hiding my emotions was what I did best after all.

“Is that how you feel about it?”

Since when had Reid become such a therapist?

“I mean, I don’t believe her for one second, if that’s what you’re asking. I just don’t know what to do about it. I’m not exactly Prince Charming in her eyes.”

“Listen, man, I’ve never known you to be someone to back down from a challenge. If you want her, which it’s clear you do, go get her.”

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