Page 128 of Consummation

I shoot Josh a look that says I don’t believe for a second we’re here to fulfillhisfantasy. So far today, Josh has dressed me like Julia Roberts,slapped a beachside condo around my neck, and told me he’ll love me forever and ever. It really doesn’t take a brain surgeonto realize he’s fulfillingmytop fantasies today, no matter what he says. “If you say so, PB,” I say, looking at him sideways.

“Oh, I do.” Josh pulls me out of the car and threads my arm into his. “You look incredible in that dress,” he whispers. He begins escorting me toward the nearby jet.

“Thank you. I absolutely love it. And thenecklace—oh my God, Josh, it’s beyond my wildest dreams.” I touch the dazzling rocks encircling my neck, still not able to comprehend they’re mine.

“That’s good. Becauseyou’rebeyond my wildest dreams, babe.”

I abruptly stop walking. “Okay, that’s it,” I say. “What the heck is going on?”

Josh furrows his brow. “What do you mean?”

“I mean I had to lesbo-out with a bisexual supermodel and hypnotize you with a devious song to trick you into saying ‘I love you’ not too long ago, and now, suddenly, you’re watchingPretty Womanand acting like Michael Bublé on steroids?”

Josh laughs and touches my belly. “Kat, just roll with it, baby. Don’t overthink it. Your job is toreact.Nothing more.”

“At first I thought maybeyou’d arranged all this because you’re so happy to be having a daughter named after your mom, but then I realized you had to have arranged all this before we found out the kumquat’s gender.”

“Don’t think, babe.React.”

“But, Josh, you watchedPretty Woman,for cryin’ out loud.Have you gone completely mad?”

Josh brushes the hair out of my face and gazes into my eyes. “Yes, I have. Completely and utterly insane.” He smiles. “And I’ve never been happier.”

I bite my lip.

“Now come on, baby—we’ve got a private plane to catch.”

When we reach the jet on the tarmac, a pilot in full uniform descends the retractable stairs and greets us. Josh leads me up the stairs and directs me to a window seat.

“You need anything?” Josh asks as I settle into my seat. “Club soda? A barf bag?”

I shake my head. “Nope. I’m good. I haven’t barfed in a few days, actually.”

“Hey, give that girl a salami,” Josh says, grinning. “Will you dome a favor and hang out here for a minute, PG? I’ve got to talk briefly to the pilot about the flight plan.”

“Is it okay if I send Sarah a photo of my necklace?”

“Of course,” Josh says. “It’s yours, after all.”

“Oh my God,” I breathe. “You just made my heart skip a beat.”

Josh grins. “I’ll be right back, baby.” He winks and disappears down the stairs.

I pull my phone out of my clutch bag, take a quick selfie (making sure my dazzling necklace is front and center), and shoot the photo off to Sarah, tapping out a quick message along with it. “OMFG,” I write. “I’m sitting on a PRIVATE PLANE wearing THIS!”

“Really? Wow! Amaaaaazing!” Sarah writes back instantly. “Where are you going?”

“I have no freaking clue!!!!!!” I write. “Josh dressed me in a Pretty Woman red dress and gave me this ridicky diamond necklace—TO KEEP!!!!!!—and told me he’s gonna love me ‘FOREVER’ and called me ‘MY LOVE’! And he didn’t pass out or hurl during any of it! And now we’re on a private jet heading to I DON’T CARE WHERE!”

“No way! That’s so exciting! WOWZERCATS!”

Even in text, something about Sarah’s reply feels canned to me. I shoot a snarky look at my display screen. “Oh, Sarah Cruz,” I write. “You’re the worst liar ever, even in text. I hope when you’re a lawyer you wind up defending only innocent people because, otherwise, your guilty clients are all going straight to prison.”

“LOL,” Sarah writes. “First off, I’m not gonna practice criminal law—I’ll be working for Gloria’s House helping women get restraining orders and stuff. Second off, I like the fact that I’m a horrible liar. It’s one of my best qualities.” She attaches a scared-face emoji to the end of her message.

“You already knew about the necklace, didn’t you?” I write.

“Of course. Do you really think I would have chosen working with my mom today over celebrating the big reveal of Gracie Louise Faraday? Come on, girl!”