Page 20 of Consummation

“No shit,” Jonas writes. “I don’t know how either of us is ever supposed to know what’s normal behavior when it comes to women. You, especially. He fucked with your head the most.”

“My head? No way,” I write. “You got it way worse than me, bro. Ten times worse.”

“I don’t think so. He hated my guts, but he loved you. Is it better to be told you’re worthless every fucking day of your life or that you’re better than everyone else? Either way, you’re fucked. At least I got to escape to the ‘treatment center’ for months at a time over the years. You were stuck there with him, day after fucking day.”

I stare at my phone. I’ve never thought about it that way. Holy shit. I think Jonas might have a point. I was Dad’s golden boy, his heir to the Faraday throne, and Jonas and I both knew it. All these years I’ve felt guilty to have garnered so much of Dad’s favor and attention—but did I actually draw the short straw, after all?

“You might have a point,” I write. “I never thought about it like that.”

“I’ve got more than a point. I’m right as rain. I’m the smart twin, remember? Never doubt me.”

“You wish.”

“Hey, I’m not the one who didn’t tell my hot girlfriend I’m moving to her city,” Jonas writes. “DUMBSHIT.”

I scowl at my phone. Jonas knows I’ve got no comeback to that. “Yeah, I fucked up,” I write.

“So did Kat break up with you when she found out?” Jonas writes.

“No, but almost,” I write. “I salvaged it. I made her play Scrabble with me until she forgave me.”

“Scrabble?” Jonas writes.

“Fun game, as it turns out, if you get creative with your words.”

“Hmm. I see what you mean. I’m already thinking about all sorts of four-letter words I could play.”

“There you go.”

“So everything’s good now?” Jonas writes. “Kat’s happy again?”

Typhoid Joe coughs violently across the waiting room and I momentarily look up from my phone. Fuck me. I hate not telling Jonas what’s going on with Colby. I never hide stuff from Jonas. But there’s no fucking way I’m gonna throw a dark cloud over the biggest day of my brother’s life.

“Everything’s great,” I write.

“Good. Don’t fuck it up again, Josh. Kat’s a great girl.”

“I’ll do my best. The question is whether I can avoid fucking it up when I don’t realize I’m fucking it up?”

“I feel you. Just think, ‘What Would Dad Do?’ and then do the opposite,” Jonas writes. “That’s pretty much my true north.”

“Good advice.”

“Hey, so what’s up with the MacKenzie deal for F&S?” Jonas writes. “Last loose end. Dying to make that fucker go away.”

“Dude. I don’t give a shit about the MacKenzie deal or anything else relating to F&S,” I write. “That place can burn to the ground as far as I’m concerned. Sayonara, fucker.”

“I’d agree if it weren’t for Uncle William. We can’t leave him hanging. Plus, the payday on the buy-out’s gonna be sweet if we set it up right.”

I pause. Jonas is right. The MacKenzie deal itself isn’t that rich, but we each stand to net close to half a billion in cash in the buy-out of Faraday & Sons by a huge conglomerate if we leave the company on strong legs, everything in place. “Okay,” I tap out. “I’ll work up the MacKenzie deal this week and put it to bed.”

“Thanks,” Jonas writes. “I’d do it myself but Sarah would kill me if I worked while we’re in Greece.”

“No. Don’t do a fucking thing. Just get engaged and bang your new fiancée every which way for the rest of the trip. I’ll handle it.”

“Roger that. Thanks, Josh.”

“Now get some sleep, bro. You’ve got a big day tomorrow.”

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