Page 38 of Consummation

“Great,” I say. I look at my watch. “After that, I think I’ll head back to the hospital to check on Colby again.”

“Can I join you? ” Sarah asks. “I’d love to give Colby a big hug.”

“I’m sorry. I think you should visit Colby after he’s home. Honestly, he’s been pretty depressed lately—he doesn’t really wanna see anyone but family.”

“Poor Colby,” Sarah says. She pulls her car out of the parking lot and heads toward the restaurant where my car is parked. “Hey, don’t forget,” Sarah says, “before you send that video to Josh, delete your apology at the end.”

I don’t reply.

“Kat. You don’t owe Josh an apology for being pregnant with his child—he made that baby right along with you.”

“I know he made the baby with me, but he didn’t intend to take the heightened risk he did. If a girl tells a guy, ‘Yes, I’m on the pill,’ then she’d better be on the frickin’ pill to the best of her ability.” I shake my head. “Plus, I was pretty harsh with him in the hospital. You know how I get when my panties are in a twist.”

Sarah makes a face that tells me she’s well aware of how I get when my panties are in a twist.

“But now I realize Josh was just doing his best in a difficult situation,” I say. “Oh, Sarah, I want him so much. I don’t care about marriage. I don’t care about the magic words. I just want Josh to bemine—I want us to love each other completely.” I let out a long, tortured exhale and put my face in my hands. “Sarah, I think I might have lost him forever.”

Sarah scoffs. “No.”

“Yes. He’s totally pulled away from me this past week. I think he might be done with me for good.”

“No, honey. Josh isn’t done with you—not even close.”

I look at her, tears in my eyes. “I love him, Sarah. I love him like I’ve never loved anyone before. I’m so scared I’ve lost him.”

“Aw, honey.”

“I want to give him everything but he’s always holding back. He’s always got his guard up. He never lets me in completely.”

“Sounds like the Faraday twins are more alike than meets the eye.” She smiles sympathetically and touches my hand. “Jonas was the same way and look at him now. He couldn’t be more ‘all-in.’ Just be patient. Josh just needs time.”

“I don’t know how to be patient.”

“I know, honey—but maybe it’s time you learned.” She purses her lips. “It’s really too bad you can’t get yourself stabbed by a Ukrainian hitman in a bathroom at U Dub. I really think that would do the trick.”

“Damned grape spoils everything,” I say. “I’d totally get myself stabbed if it weren’t for the damned grape.”

Sarah laughs.

“And Josh meeting my family is off the table, too, at least for a while. At this point, that would be a recipe for disaster.”

Sarah makes a sympathetic face.

“So other than those two ideas, what other ‘external event’ could I arrange to make Josh realize he loves me and finally wants to go ‘all-in’?” I ask. “Obviously, me being pregnant with his spawn didn’t do the trick.”

“I dunno,” Sarah says. “It’s gotta be something that makes Josh realize you love him completely—like, you know,unconditionally. If you can convince him he’s completely safe with you, no matter what, then maybe he’ll feel like he can finally let go and love you the same way in return.”

“Good idea in concept,” I say. “But I have no idea what that ‘something’ would be.” I bite the inside of my cheek and look out the car window. “Hmm.”

“Hmm,” Sarah agrees. “Can you think of something that would make him feel—”

“I’ve got it.” I sit up in my seat, adrenaline flooding me. “I know exactly what to do.”

“Well, that was fast. What is it?” Sarah asks.

A demonic smile spreads across my face.

“What?” Sarah asks. “Oh my God—what?”

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