Page 32 of Insatiable Hunger

“Can I come in?”

“It was nice to meet you,Zeke,” he spits out with a sneer. “But if you don’t mind, I’m kind of tired and would rather you not. Have fun with my mom, though.”

And with that, he slams the door in my face just as I hear Valerie somewhere in the house.

Back in the living room, my gaze connects with Valerie. “Oh, there you are. I was looking for you.”

“Had to use the restroom,” I lie.

“Do you want something to drink?” she offers, pointing behind her into the kitchen.

“I’m okay. I’ll probably head home soon.”

Valerie’s expression softens. “Is this about Elias?”

My heart stops beating for a second. “Why would it be about Elias?” I ask, my voice not revealing anything.

Sighing, she mutters, “Elias is normally so much more friendly than that. He must really not be feeling well.”

I let out the breath I’d been holding. “Val, it’s fine. Really. Like you’ve said before, you didn’t date much while he was growing up. Seeing you with someone is probably jarring.”

Especially when that someone has been inside you.

“You’re probably right.” She brushes a few strands of hair out of her face that have fallen out of her bun, probably from when she was watering the plants. “Well, I’m off the rest of the weekend since he’s here, but I’m sure I’ll talk to you sometime before next weekend.”

“Yeah, of course.”

***

Sitting in the office at my house, my elbows rest on my knees as my head hangs. I’m four scotches deep, and the guilt, the doubt, and the shock are too strong. The events of tonight that I thought I could drink away come rushing back to me.

How the fuck could this happen?

My phone sits heavy in my hands. I know what I need to do. There’s no way I can go through with this wedding knowing what I know and having done what I did. It doesn’t matter if it was before we got engaged. It’s wrong and Val deserves better than that.

“Fuck!”

Unlocking my phone, I pull up her contact and hit call, bringing it up to my ear as I down the rest of my drink. It only rings a few times before connecting, her soft, gentle voice coming through the line.

“Hey, what’s going on?”

“Val, we gotta talk.” My voice is gruff, like it hasn’t been used in a while.

“Okay…” I can hear shuffling on her end. Probably her sitting down. “That sounds entirely too ominous. Is everything okay?”

The words sit on the back of my tongue, bitter and sharp. I’ve always been so sure of myself—so sure of my decisions—until today. Now, I’m not so sure. “I don’t think I can do this,” I mutter. “I don’t thinkwecan do this, Valerie.”

She’s silent for a moment, only the sound of my beating heart in my ears. “What’s this about, Zeke?”

Valerie is one of the most patient and loving people I’ve ever known. Her love for those around her could move mountains. It’s one of the things I admire about her. It’s also the reason this is so hard.

My throat feels tight as I run a hand through my hair. “You just… you deserve better than this, Val. Better than me.”

“Oh, honey,” she sighs. “It’s okay to have cold feet. It’s a normal feeling to have with something like this. And if this is about Elias, he’ll come around. I’m sure of it.”

At even the mention of him, my body vibrates.

When I don’t say anything back, Valerie continues. “Zeke, I know who you are, and I love you. You’re my best friend, and whatever it is you’re feeling, we can get through it.”

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