Page 22 of Fragile Sanctuary

I leanedback in the Adirondack chair, kicking my feet onto the porch railing. The sun hovered just below the horizon, only a sliver of it still peeking out. It cast an orangey hue on the land around us.

I could give Sparrow Falls that. Her sunsets were beautiful. And the small cabin I rented halfway up one of the area’s many mountains gave me a damn good vantage point.

But it didn’t carry the peace it usually did today. A twitchiness had descended over me, even with a full day of work. Typically, I could count on my new career path to exhaust me so thoroughly that I slept like the dead.

I needed that. And on days when I wasn’t working, I ran. Years ago, I’d logged hours at the gym to stay in shape. Now, I raced through mountain trails in an attempt to escape my demons.

My fingers itched to pull out my phone, text Shep, and make sure Rhodes had locked her damn gate. I didn’t even want to think about her doors.

A muscle in my cheek fluttered, and I forced my hand to grab a glass bottle damp with condensation instead. I lifted it to my mouth, taking a deep pull. It didn’t have the kick I needed, but it would have to do.

My gaze resettled on the book in my lap. The black-and-white squares stared back at me. Half were already filled in, but the puzzle didn’t have the same sort of pull it usually did. And that only made the tic in my cheek intensify.

It was the only sort of word game I could handle these days and the only way I could let my brain have the outlet it needed without ramifications. The letters danced and spun in front of my vision. I could look at the prompt for a clue, but once I got things about halfway filled in, I liked to move without them. It was more of a challenge that way.

My brain flipped through the letters in the alphabet like a running in board in a train station. It came up with possibility after possibility until one hit that actually worked. I scrawled the letters onto the page.

The sound of tires on gravel had me putting the puzzle and pen on the worn side table. I reached underneath to where I stored my Glock, my hand hovering over it until I saw the familiar silver of Shep’s truck.

The vise around my torso eased a fraction, but I didn’t move. Shep pulled to a stop in front of my cabin and climbed out of his rig, holding some sort of dish. “Brought you leftovers.”

I stared at him as he headed up the porch steps. “I do know how to feed myself.”

Shep shoved the plate at me. “You eat one more of those frozen meals, and you’re going to get heart disease and croak on the job.”

He lowered himself into the chair next to me without waiting for an invitation. I needed to use that chair for kindling.

I unwrapped a corner of the plate, and the scents of garlic, tomatoes, sausage, and cheese hit me. I tugged the foil off. Shep’s mom was always thorough. Next to the slice of lasagna and salad was a plasticfork. And beneath the paper plate was a napkin. I didn’t pretend to be uninterested; I simply dug in.

Shep kicked his feet up onto the railing. “If you’d come to dinner, you would’ve gotten garlic bread and brownie sundaes, too.”

I just grunted. Brownie sundaes weren’t worth dealing with the football team that was Shep’s family. I’d take leftovers over people any day.

Shep glanced down at my crossword puzzle and shook his head. “I’ll never understand how you do those damned things in pen.”

I took a pull of ginger beer, swallowing it down. “Pencils are for amateurs.”

He just rolled his eyes. “Sometimes, I forget what a pompous prick you can be.”

Shep wasn’t wrong. But it used to be so much worse. I was so sure I had the answers to everything. And I’d been so fucking wrong—in the worst way. A way that had me losing the person who meant the most to me.

I shoved down the thoughts and memories, burying them under pounds of denial and self-flagellation. “You talk to Rhodes about locking her gate and doors?”

Shep’s brows rose as he turned to face me. “She knows how to take care of herself.”

Annoyance pricked like those tiny stickers that got stuck in my shoes on trail runs. “Clearly, she doesn’t since the last time I saw her, she almost broke her neck doing something stupid.”

His jaw worked back and forth. “She knows it was a mistake.”

“Good.” But that wasn’t enough. Images of her living on that massive piece of property, alone, swirled in my head. “That house is way out, though. She needs to take different precautions than when she lived in town. Those properties can be targets because there aren’t neighbors to hear. And word’ll get around that a single woman is living out there alone.”

Shep was silent for a good long moment, but I felt his gaze boring into me. “You doing okay?”

Fuck.

I did not need this. Not tonight. For whatever reason, my demons were already stirred up. They didn’t need Shep’s help.

“Fine,” I clipped.

---