Page 21 of Beautiful Exile

Always wanted to take a trip to Minnesota. Just long enough to sell them for parts.

Beneath the text was a photo of a signed contract between him and Ice Edge. My gut twisted. Shawn had no idea what he’d done. My father had likely promised him the world, but his company was about to be no more. And for what? To get at me? To prove he was the apex predator?

Another text appeared as I stared at the screen. It gave me all the answers I never wanted.

Philip Pierce

There will be more if you don’t come home for the wedding. I won’t have you embarrass this family any further.

7

ARDEN

I wrappedmy hands around my mug and stared out at the mountains. Breathing deeply, I took in the scent of coffee mixed with pine as I watched my girls graze. Brutus lay on the patio, his favorite spot when the sun had baked the stones for hours.

It was beautiful, my little spot in the world. But it sometimes felt like a beautiful exile—the one place in the world where I was truly safe. But that safety could lock you in a place.

Not today.

In a few minutes, I would grab my bag and drive to Kye’s gym. I would make the choice to leave these invisible walls. Because it was achoice. One that required tamping down the fear stoked by over a decade of warnings to be careful, cautious, and not let anyone truly know me.

That sort of endless refrain had a price. One that meant an echo of fear still lived in my head. It also meant I wasn’t especially good at peopling.

Brutus lifted his head, his gray fur shimmering in the afternoon light. A second later, I heard the sound of an approaching vehicle. Mymuscles tensed, the way they always did. The stiffening was slight, a mixture of preparedness and not wanting my solitude interrupted.

Brutus pushed to his feet just before a door slammed. He positioned himself between me and the path someone would take to round the house. His muscles quivered with the same tension I had.

But the moment the figure appeared, he let out a happy bark, his entire body wagging. “Freigeben,” I told him, giving Brutus the command for release.

He bounded over to the woman whose gray hair was wild, like the creature herself. She wore a workout set with cropped and flared leggings that were tie-dyed in various shades of pink, purple, and blue. Her T-shirt was tied in a knot at her hips and readI know my CBDswith a large, bedazzled pot leaf across the center.

“My big, beautiful beast,” she greeted Brutus, bending to give him all the pets.

A smile tugged at my lips. God, I loved this woman. Lolli was the first of the Colson clan to reach me when I arrived in Oregon. She’d come to live with her daughter, Nora, after Nora’s husband and son passed away in a car accident, leaving her to raise their two biological children, adopted son, and foster kids herself.

But Nora hadn’t once considered no longer fostering. She was one of the strongest people I’d ever met, and you could see she’d gotten that strength from her mom.

Lolli glanced up at me as she kept giving Brutus his rubdown, endless bracelets jangling. “And how’s my Little Gremlin? I’m surprised you’re even awake.”

I grinned at her. “It’s after two.”

Lolli straightened, crossing to me and pressing a kiss to my cheek. “But my girl is like a bat. Prefers to hunt at night.”

I snorted. “I’m not exactly hunting.”

“Okay, fine. My girl likes to create at night.”

That much was true. My creativity flowed best after the sun went down or first thing in the morning. Sleep never came easily to me, so I figured I might as well get some work done.

“How’s the new piece coming along?” Lolli asked.

Her asking about my work never bothered me because it never felt like pressure. Maybe because she was the one who’d given me the gift of art in the first place. I’d never forget her setting up two easels in front of the horse pasture and inviting me to paint with her.

Weeks passed where we simply painted together. She never asked me questions or pushed me to speak. She simply let me open up in my own time.

It was Lolli I talked to about my fears: that the man with the gun would find me, too; that I’d never be safe.

And it was Lolli who encouraged me to take all that fear and put it onto a canvas. From that day on, I hadn’t stopped. And I had her to thank for it.