Page 65 of Beautiful Exile

Ellie’s mouth curved slightly. “Maybe I was a cowgirl in another life.”

I studied her for a moment. “Why can’t you be one in this life?”

Ellie went quiet as if some battle was playing out inside her. “Do you ever feel like your life has been laid out in front of you, and there are no moves left to play?”

My muscles stiffened, tightening around every bone in my body. “There arealwaysmoves left to play.”

Ellie kept her gaze locked on Sunny, continuing to stroke. “Not for me, there’s not.”

The grief of that hit me square in the chest, and I could see what Linc was terrified of now. He worried this bright light would be dimmed—or worse, snuffed out entirely. “If you think there are no moves left, then topple the damn board. Start fresh.”

Ellie’s eyes lifted, her gaze finally meeting mine, a sad smile lining her lips. “Just that easy, huh?”

“Just that easy.”

She shifted and glanced up at the farmhouse. “It’s nice that you have this. Linc and me, our family, it was never even close to this.”

That twisting sensation intensified. “Sometimes, having the hard, painful, and the lack makes us appreciate when we find the good. It allows us to value it. To hold on and never let go.”

Ellie’s eyes misted. “I’m glad you found that.”

I reached out and squeezed her hand. “You’ll find it, too. You just have to step into the darkness.”

Her throat worked as she swallowed. “I don’t know if I’m brave enough for that.”

“Maybe not today. But one day, you will be. You just need to keep trying until you’re ready.”

Ellie nodded, then looked out at all the horses. “One day.”

I glanced back up at the house, and that’s when I saw him standing in the shadows of the darkened evening, watching. Worry and pain swirled in those hypnotic eyes. And I knew Linc was battling those demons tonight.

24

LINCOLN

I kickedback in one of the chairs on Cope’s back patio and stared into the night as if it held all the answers to my problems. And maybe it did if I stared long and hard enough. If not, that’s why I had bourbon.

My fingers curved around the glass as if it could reassure me. I lifted it, tipping back a sip and letting the flavors of plum and cinnamon play on my tongue. The heat tracked down my throat, warming me from the inside. And that was a good thing, given the cold set in once the sun sank behind the mountains.

But the cold helped, too. It numbed the edges. Just not enough. And the bourbon wouldn’t either, not even if I downed the whole bottle.

I didn’t hear her until she lowered herself into the chair next to mine. Brutus instantly sat at her feet as she switched off a small flashlight. The moon was almost full, casting Arden in a glow that any artist would kill to paint. She eased into the chair, pulling her knees up and curling her body. “Whatcha got there?”

She voiced the words without looking, simply staring out at the horizon.

I wanted to chide her for walking over here in the dark, even with Brutus and her training, but I couldn’t stop staring. I took in how the moonlight danced across the apples of her cheeks, revealing the scattering of tiny freckles there and the way her body curved like a goddamn sculpture, one I wanted to trace with my fingers and tongue.

Fuck.

“Bourbon,” I rasped.

Arden’s gaze came to me then, a small smile playing on her lips. “Didn’t take you for a bourbon drinker.”

“What’d you think was my drink?” I was suddenly curious what she would peg me with. But I was curious about everything she thought. Every wild thing that swirled in her beautiful mind.

Her smile widened a fraction. “I don’t know. Champagne? Some ridiculously expensive scotch?”

I took a sip, letting the flavors swirl and heat again, then set the glass on the arm of my chair. “If it makes you feel any better, this is ridiculously expensive Kentucky bourbon.”

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