Page 81 of Viparious

“You’re a perfect dream. At night, this, how you are right now, is utter perfection. But I’ll wake up, and this Vlad won’t exist anymore.”

I stroke up her back to hold her nape and beg without the words.

“Would you give me your nights?”

Her smile is sad again and I hold my breath, waiting for her answer. I’d take the little moments, anything she felt like giving me would be accepted easily. But she doesn’t and looks at Verena sleeping on my other side.

“They’re not just my nights anymore.”

Leaning over me, she kisses our daughter’s head and I have to force my body not to tighten around them both.

My skin turns cold without her as she slips off my thigh and stands between them. I expect her to take our daughter from me, but she holds my face in both hands and presses her lips to my forehead. “Spend time with her in the daylight as well.”

She doesn’t look back at me as she walks out of the room.

A grumble comes from my lap, and I look down to see Verena open one eye and look around as though she’s checking I’ve taken note of Inessa’s order. Holding the little queen up so we’re face to face, her grumpiness comes out at being moved.

“Ya slyshal yeye, malen’kaya koroleva2.”

She doesn’t open her eyes and smirks in her sleep.I’ve never been prouder than I am at this moment, even though I have two living weaknesses, two people who can destroy me at any given moment, I wouldn’t want her to be anything other than her mother’s daughter.

That little lift eases everything inside of me. Inessa won’t be out of my life fully. We’re bound together because of the stink bomb in my hands. Between Verena and her mother, they both keep wiping their mess on me and I’m forced to get up when she literally fucking shits on me.

“I told you I heard her.”

Going back into our room, the best sound I’ve ever heard comes from the bed as Inessa nearly falls off it from the force of her laugh. I walk slower so I can hear more of it. But she sits up and hugs a pillow, muting what I want. Needing more, I coax her to follow me as I go into the bathroom.

“Boys are worse. They piss on you every time you change them.”

It works and my queen floats behind me. There’s no wince as she pushes up on her palms to sit on the vanity. I’ve checked her doctor’s notes, her stitches have healed with Dani being on strict orders not to allow Inessa to lift a single thing. Even Viktor has been following her around for the past couple of months, and he’s turned into her assistant, holding anything she needs. At one point, he refused to let her hold her own phone, holding it in front of her face so she could type out a message.

I turn the shower on, and her cheeks twitch from withholding her humor as she sees how much of my clothes and hands are covered. It’s in her eyes, lighting up her features and I’d stand in front of her covered in shit if she never looks away. Getting rid of our soiled clothes, appreciation mixes with her humor. I’m flexing like an arrogant dickhead, but I don’t give a fuck. As long as her eyes stay on me, I’ll become a clown to entertain her.She hasn’t forced the topic of getting divorced, so I assume that she’s changed her mind. Rationally, I know it’s due to me burning the papers and blocking her lawyer from contacting her. Any paperwork that’s sent to her is also burnt and she’s been too busy to remember something insignificant that will never happen.

Going under the spray, I lean forward, keeping it off Verena and my queen slips off the vanity. She stands at the edge of the shower, but she doesn’t step inside or take her t-shirt off, just stands watch with the softest smile on her face. Feeling the need to defend myself or to strengthen my own resolve, I sound weak as fuck.

“I won’t drop her.”

I’ve done this countless times. When Valentin wouldn’t calm down in the night, it was the only thing that would relax him. Maybe it’s because I was a dumb kid and never understood the depth of responsibility, but fear snakes up my spine now. Verena fits in one hand but I keep the other against her back as the runoff spray drips onto her body.

Four words relax me.

“I know you won’t.”

Inessa agreeing makes the voice in my head shut the fuck up. Her gentle voice is louder than history. She doesn’t move away as I clean us both up and acts like an assistant, handing me a towel and taking Verena to dress her.

Every little thing comes back when they’re not in front of me. The fist around my lungs tightens and there’s a phantom breeze against my damp back. I know there isn’t a window open. I’d hear it and the alert would go off. But my stupid fucking brain refuses to accept the facts. It was the same with Viktor when he was a baby, this doubt in my head and I’d check it every five minutes just so I could breathe.

Going into the bedroom for physical confirmation, my muscles loosen seeing every pane sealed. I’m still staring at the wall, checking each window, when arms wrap around my middle and soft lips press against the center of my chest. My lips lift at the action and fall as soon as she opens her fucking mouth.

“Thank you. This was a good way to spend our last night here.”

There haven’t been any listings sent to me after I purchased each property Inessa found under a shell company. It’s the only way I’ve been able to force her to stay here. I’ve never fucking agreed to being honest, and it’s not an outright lie when the sale has fallen through. She doesn’t need to know the other party was me. None of them were good enough, they didn’t have horses and we do. They didn’t have a big enough guard house and I’m not allowing my wife and child to live unprotected. Or they were just wrong in some way, not physically, it was a feeling.

1 Little star

2 I heard her, little queen

TWENTY-FOUR