Page 24 of Under Pink Skies

“All part of a balanced diet.”

I couldn’t stop the incredulous laugh that escaped me as I finished scanning the rest of his items. Things certainly were different.

I felt Connor’s eyes on me as I began placing the food into a paper bag. I flipped the tablet around so he could scan his card, but Connor smiled and handed me two twenty-dollar bills. My chest seized as I met his gaze, unable to make my heart understand that things were not the same as they were.

Things could never be the same.

Connor saved me from making a fool of myself by putting the change I barely remember counting out into the small jar next to the register. He turned his back to me, heading for the front door.

“Connor?” I said, digging my nails into my palm as I fought to keep from screaming.

He hesitated, shifting the brown paper bag to his other arm as he looked over his shoulder.

“I don’t know how long you’ll be in town, but you should know that I don’t talk about the past anymore.” I took another deep breath, knowing that what I was going to say next would shatter both of us. But I also knew that if I didn’t set this boundary now, I would never set it. And for my sanity—for my wellbeing—I had to.

“And . . . you lost the right to ask me anything about my family when you left.”

Connor went rigid with a precision I’d never seen from him.

“I’m happy to assist you in procuring whatever resources you’ll need for your stay in Watford,” I said, fighting to keep my voice level, “and I’ll assist you in whatever way I can for the festival, but I respectfully ask that you keep business between us strictly professional.”

“Understood. You’ll have no trouble with me.”

I could have sworn the light faded from Connor’s eyes as he nodded his agreement, tucking the paper bag beneath his arm and forcing the door open. The momentum from the door slamming flipped the door sign from ‘open’ to ‘closed.’ I dusted off the remaining flour from the front of my jeans and inhaled a shaky breath.

I slumped down against the back wall of the general store and focused on the sound of my breathing.

“I can’t do this,” I whispered to no one in particular. I still didn’t know what I was going to do with my father. The store was drowning in debt and the IRS audit, and my heart . . . my heart kept breaking over and over and over again.

Because Iwantedhim. I had never stopped wanting him, even in the darkest weeks after the funeral. I wanted my person. I wanted to know that my life wasn’t spinning out in front of me in some irrevocable way.

I had kept my eye on the door.

I had kept my eye on the horizon, waiting for Lucy to appear on Main Street, where Connor would be back at my side with a perfectly reasonable explanation for why he’d disappeared in the first place.

God, help me, I still wanted that. I wanted to deny it, but I couldn’t.

How was I supposed to forget someone I knew so well? How was I supposed to ignore someone I once planned to spend forever with?

I had lost everything in the month after graduation. I’ lost my mom, and by extension, I lost my father. But I also losthim.

And now Connor Harvey was back in Watford, and I couldn’t fuckingbreathe.

Chapter 8

Connor

Iletthefrontdoor of Watford General slam shut.

The ache in my chest turned to a blazing burn.

The dark and twisted part of me wanted to punch an inanimate object, but I knew better than to trust my emotions at this moment.

I placed both of my palms against the cool window of my truck, allowing my emotions to take the reins for one, two, three seconds, before I pulled back and calmed my breathing.

When I first joined the service, all I wanted was violence. I was angry. I wished for a war so I could prove to everyone—especially my uncle—that I wasn’t weak-willed or weak-minded. I wanted to show that I could hold my own in the toughest military branch and could have a successful career far away from Watford. I wanted anyone and everyone to know I was capable.

I quickly discovered that the military would teach me many lessons about life. None of them were lessons I was expecting, and all of them were lessons I desperately needed to learn.

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