Page 25 of Under Pink Skies

Most importantly, I understood that there was nothing in my life I could control. I’d been thirsty for control, desperate for it—even as I stood at Camp Pendleton’s gate with a drill instructor screaming at me. When I stood at the phone booth where new recruits made phone calls to their families to let them know they’ had arrived at boot camp safely, I knew damn well there was only one person I could dial, and she wouldn’t pick up the phone.

I pretended to call home. I picked up the phone, read the script, and slammed the phone back down on the receiver. I vowed to leave Watford behind as I sat in the chair to have my head shaved.

I left it all behind. I was young and naive enough to think that I could simply erase all memories of her, of our time together, from my memory with enough willpower. I reasoned I could focus on my career hard enough that all memories of my past would fade. I convinced myself I could outrun the abuse, my developing addiction issues, and the gaping Abbie-sized hole in my chest.

It was a foolish hope even then.

“You alright?”

Lucas’s voice shook me from my thoughts. I rubbed a dirty palm down my face, grateful for the dirt and sweat that covered my body. I’d always enjoyed working with my hands. Knowing that I was doing something that mattered, even if it was simply scouting out the Watford landscape, gave me a small dose of satisfaction.

“I’m alright. Got in touch with Abbie.”

Lucas raised an eyebrow. When I didn’t elaborate, he nodded. “Thanks for doing that. I grabbed you a burger and fries for dinner. Hope that’s okay.”

It was my turn to nod. I’d use the groceries I just bought to make dinner for the guys tomorrow when everyone was together again. Lucas grabbed my groceries while I slid into the driver’s seat, cranking the engine to life.

I dared one last glance back at Watford General while Lucas was buckling his seatbelt. Abbie stood behind the counter, fiddling with the necklace in between her collarbones as she watched me.

My heart sped up. I hadn’t even thought to look at the necklace.

I wasn’t stupid enough to think it was the one I’d given her back in high school, but that silly, boyish part of me still roared to life at the idea that it was the silver daisy chain I’d bought her.

Abbie looked surprised as our eyes met, and she quickly averted her gaze, grabbing a clipboard and practically sprinting to the back of the store.

I shook my head, clearing all thoughts of Abbie.

Abbie had set a boundary. It was best we kept our distance from one another. It wouldn’t do either of us any favors to open old wounds. Or, in my case, pour salt in the ones that still hadn’t healed.

“I’ve got to stop by the sheriff’s office on the way back. Got a text from Kameron about there being some permits and safety pamphlets for the festival there for us to pick up. That okay with you?”

“Sure,” I said.

“Mind staying with the car?” Lucas asked as I parked along the curb outside the sheriff’s office. “I’ll just be a minute.”

Something about Lucas’s demeanor felt off to me, but I said nothing. I couldn’t imagine he had personal business in Watford, but then again, the guy seemed to play his cards close to his chest.

“Not at all. Go ahead.”

Lucas ducked inside the sheriff’s office, and I shut off the car, hopping out and onto the curb. It was a mild day in Watford because autumn was approaching. A gentle breeze swept the sand and dirt around my boots as I leaned against the truck, looking down the street toward the majestic mountains beyond.

The Roadhouse still stood tall and proud on the north corner of the major intersection, which didn’t surprise me. This entire town could crumble into dust, and the Roadhouse Bar would be the only establishment left standing.

I stuck my hands in my pockets, drawing random designs into the dust with the toe of my boot.

“Connor Harvey?”

My head snapped up at the sound of my name, and I searched for the person who’d called me.

“Sorry to spook you, son. I honestly wasn’t certain it was you.”

“Officer Ludgate,” I said, straightening my back and extending my hand to him. “It is me.”

Ludgate took my outstretched hand and shook it, more out of politeness than anything. He looked shell-shocked to see me standing on the curb outside of the sheriff’s office.

“I gotta say, Harvey, I didn’t expect to see you back here. Ever.”

My jaw twitched as I pulled my hand back from his.You and me both.

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