Page 11 of Ties That Bind Us

Even I could recognize I was making excuses. “Not exactly, no. But guys like that . . .”

“Ava, I swear, I am going to murder you.” Angie’s voice rang out from the house as she came out to the pool.

“Damn it. Hide me,” I groaned, putting my magazine over my face and sinking low into the chair. I certainly wasn’t equipped to deal with the wrath of my other sister right now.

“I think she’s gotten scarier since she’s become a mother.” Bella snickered.

“Do you want to explain why you ran out in the middle of a date with Rob last night?” I could tell by the sound of her voice she was standing over me.

“I didn’t run out in the middle of our date. He knew I was leaving and I even left cash for the check. Now, do you think you could scoot over? You’re blocking my sun.”

She picked the magazine up off my face, rolled it up, and hit me with it. I flinched but couldn’t help laughing.

“Lighten up, Ang.” Bella rubbed some lotion into her shoulders. “Just because Ava had fantastic sex last night and you haven’t gotten laid in a while doesn’t mean—”

“Bella!” I hissed, covering my eyes with my hand.

“Don’t start with me, Bella. I only have time to kill one annoying little sister today and Ava is at the top of my list.” Angie arched her eyebrows at me. “You ran out on Rob to go hook up with another man?” She tapped her perfectly manicured fingers on her hip, waiting for some kind of explanation.

“Angie, Rob was great, but there wasn’t any connection between us. He was . . . I don’t know, just not the guy for me. It wasn’t going to go anywhere and instead of dragging it out, I figured it was best to not waste his time.”

“And you knew that from one conversation? Ava, Rob has a stable job, he comes from a good family, he’s the type of guy who would take care of you. What more could you want?”

Passion. Adventure. There were actually several other things, but I didn’t say that out loud. It had been ingrained in us early on in life that our only real responsibility within the family was to marry a respectable man whom my father could profit from in some way. He and my mother had very old-school values, and even as children my sisters and I were meant to be seen and not heard. We were expected to follow our mother’s example, learning how to scrub kitchen cabinets and fold laundry, and have a hot dinner on the table when our father came home from a long day at work. It was something I resisted from the very beginning, which only got me in trouble. As twins, the difference in treatment between Andrew and me was painfully obvious, and I wanted nothing more than to spend my days playing in the backyard and getting muddy with him. Instead, I was holed up in the house learning how to scrub the inside of the oven or put on the perfect dinner party. Vince and Andrew were immersed in every aspect of my father’s business, whereas my sisters and I weren’t even allowed to ask questions about it. It was a miracle in itself that my dad had agreed to let me go to law school. Women didn’t need education to be useful in his mind. In fact, sometimes too much education was a hindrance. I guess that’s where my resentment for this lifestyle began. My dreams revolved more around traveling the world, visiting little villages, and immersing myself in their cultures. As cliched as it was, I wanted to find myself before finding someone to spend the rest of my life with. I felt like I was still picking up the pieces of who I was before I lost my brother, and that was hard for anyone in my family to grasp. I wanted to be a whole person again before I really started considering marriage or what came next for me.

Of course, Angie didn’t understand this. She had bought into the antiquated stereotype from the beginning. She found a good, wholesome guy my parents approved of in Mike, moved two streets away from our childhood home, and started popping out kids almost immediately. She’d never questioned it, wanted more, or strayed from the plan in the slightest, even when we were children. All she wanted to do was be a wife and mother, and while I respected her choice, it was the exact opposite of how I felt. I had certainly taken my share of detours from that path, and so had Bella. No one was nearly as concerned with Bella, though, because she was engaged to an oil heir from Miami. When my father met him, all he saw was the potential business opportunity, and at that point, nothing else was important. Personally, I felt like Bella was trapped. She was also just trying to appease my father, and I doubted she actually had any feelings for Max. I thought she was trapped, but we both knew if Max went away, so would his family’s partnership with my father.

“I don’t need someone to take care of me, Angie. Look, I appreciate you setting up the date, but I’m not going to settle for someone just because everyone in this family thinks I need to get married. No offense, but that’s not the kind of life I want.”

Angie scowled, obviously having taken offense to my statement. “You say that now, Ava, but someday you’re going to realize you’re making a big mistake by passing all of these men up. You’re going to wake up alone, and wish you’d listened to us.”

“Okay, I’m going inside,” I said, standing up and grabbing my things. I wasn’t going to win this battle. That I had learned long ago.

Angie shrugged, then took my spot on the chair. “Dad wants to see you in his office.”

My stomach lurched. Fantastic. Did he somehow know about last night? That was the last thing I wanted to deal with right now.

I slipped a cover-up on and patted down the hallway to my father’s office.

I knocked softly and heard him grunt on the other side. The door was heavy as I pushed it open and entered the office. It was dimly lit and smelled like a mix of pine and cigar smoke. My father sat stoically behind the desk, glasses on, staring intently at a paper in his hands—as intimidating as ever.

“You wanted to see me, Daddy?” I mustered up the sweetest voice I could manage. Despite the animosity between us, all I ever wanted was for him to be proud of me. Nothing ever seemed to be good enough, even more so in the last few months. He was a hardened businessman, and his world didn’t have much room in it for children—especially wayward daughters.

“Ava,” He sighed, looking up at me. “You didn’t come home last night.”

I bit my lip, holding in a sharp breath. I’m not sure why I thought I could get away with this to begin with. I was an adult, it wasn’t like he could ground me, but it still didn’t make this any easier. Standing in front of my angry father was every bit as terrifying as a twenty-three-year-old as it had been as a nine-year-old.

“Ava!” my dad snapped sternly, expecting an answer even though he hadn’t asked me anything specifically.

“No, I didn’t,” I said quickly. “I stayed at a friend’s house and . . .”

“You better think twice before you lie to me, Ava.” He glared at me. “You’re an adult and are capable of making your own decisions, but at least stand by them enough to tell me the truth.”

I let out a slow sigh, contemplating my next move. I had two choices here: I could tell him the truth or I could continue to try to lie my way out of this. Neither seemed like a fantastic idea.

“Your mother and I are concerned. Things were better for a while, but I’m starting to see glimpses of who you were after we lost Andrew, and I’ll be damned if we go down that road again.” He narrowed his eyes at me. It was a dark memory for all of us. Losing Andrew was like losing the other half of my heart, and for weeks I was so swallowed up with grief and blame that I couldn’t even function. Eventually, I found the best way to deal with it that I could at the time: by drowning whatever I was feeling in alcohol and drugs and partying, so that I couldn’t remember why I was depressed to begin with. It was a slippery slope and even though it made me feel better temporarily, I quickly found myself in the throes of addiction. I had been drug-free for a few months now, but it had been a long and nasty road, and I had to fight like hell to get here. I still had a lot of work to do, but I was getting there, and his lack of faith in me stung.

“Dad, I’m not—” I started, but was quickly cut off.