Page 66 of The Last Dance

‘No, no. I think you’ll be surprised with how it ends.’ I point to the screen as Matthew’s face appears. I look to Karmen. Her mouth has dropped open and her eyes glaze over with tears. I don’t want to hurt her with this, but I think she needs to know who she’s chosen to trust. I mean, that’s a favor Matthew did even for me with this video.

She’s silent as it ends.

‘I think we both know where this is going.’

‘It was only that one time…’

I nod. ‘I get it. Look, I know all too well how easy it is to hold onto someone you lost. I just wish you’d told me the truth about Matthew before.’

‘I know, I’m so sorry. I’ve definitely learned my lesson. I’ll never lie to you again. You know how much I love you.’ She tries to kiss me, as if I’m giving her a chance to come clean, apologize and move on with our lives, but I step away.

I thought about letting the tape do the talking but that wouldn’t push me to be a better man like I’m hoping to be. Granted, I’m not hoping to be this better man for Karmen, but I need to do what’s right here.

‘I can’t stay, Karmen. I’ve moved my things out today. I was all set to tell you I’m in love with somebody else when I got the video. I’m sorry. I can’t stay with you.’

‘What?You’recheating onme?’ she asks, as if it’s not even possible for someone else to be that interested in me.

I shake my head and glance back at the screen where the video played. ‘I’mnot. I would never cheat on anyone. I’m not sure you can say the same judging by what I’ve just seen. Finally I’m realizing exactly how I feel.’ I don’t know why I want to ask her this, but I do. ‘Can I ask you something?’

She nods.

‘Why the conversation about marriage if you had him on the side? I don’t get it.’

She sighs, giving me a little shrug. ‘I thought if you proposed that maybe he’d get jealous and finally decide he wanted me back.’

‘If I hadn’t already reached the place I’m at mentally, do you have any idea what that might have done to me?’ I’m starting to understand what I did to Ambri when I left the way I did.

She shakes her head.

‘So, our entire relationship was you using me to get back your ex?’

She shrugs, a frown on her face. ‘No. I loved you, I really did, but for some reason I never really got over him like I thought I eventually would.’

I nod, mostly mad at myself for trusting her to begin with. I shut my laptop, sliding it into my bag.

‘Well… at least you’ve got someone to make this all easier on you.’ I drape the bag strap over my shoulder. ‘Bye, Karmen.’ As I leave the apartment she doesn’t follow me or request we even talk anymore about it. Had I known all this before I’d have left her in LA so she could easily run straight into Matthew’s arms and never look back. Which I think was about to happen anyway.

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