Page 34 of He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

‘The dorky side?’

I laugh. ‘Yeah. Dorky Dax to your rescue. I mean the side of me that has feelings. I don’t let those loose often. You’re one of the only people who’ve gotten a look in here.’ I touch my chest.

Her smile is adorable in a way that makes me long to kiss her.

‘In that case, I owe you an apology. I’m sorry I worried you before. Once I find something to fill my days, like a job, I’ll be alright.’

‘A job,’ I say mostly to myself. ‘You need a job.’ A light bulb goes off in my head. ‘Of course. I don’t know why I didn’t think of it before. I need an assistant for the show.’ I sit up, turning towards her. ‘You like flowers, Hols?’

‘Yes?’ she asks it as a question, clearly confused.

‘I get to choose someone to help with challenges that will happen in a time crunch and they aren’t allowed to have floristry experience. What would you think if I asked you?’

She lifts an eyebrow, staring at me.

‘I’d be with you every step of the way. I can teach you everything you’d need to know.’

‘Me?’

‘Why not? It could be fun. Maybe you’ll find yourself in the process?’

The two of us stare at one another.

‘I know it seems like I’ve got no worries,’ I tell her. ‘Like I know exactly what I want and how to get there, but that’s not entirely true. This show, putting myself out there for strangers to judge, scares me. Maybe I’m not as good at this flower thing as I think I am? I don’t know, but I’ve got a lot riding on this, and if I fail, I’ll only be able to blame myself. But if you were with me…’ I hesitate, a goofy grin growing on my face. ‘I could blame you.’

I’m obviously kidding but watching her smile at my words makes me feel better about all of it.

‘My future rides on this show, Hollyn. It’d be nice to have someone with me that I trusted.’

‘You trust me?’ She sounds surprised.

‘I’ve got no reason not to.’

‘We don’t know each other anymore, though.’

‘Call it a gut feeling.’

8

HOLLYN

Moments Later…

‘What do you think?’ he asks, his head cocked, a hopeful smile on his face.

I think it sounds incredible. Dax makes me feel like I’m not a total loser. But I can’t do that to him. I’m a mess. I’m the last person on earth who could help someone else reach their dreams. Especially considering I’ve got no dreams of my own currently.

‘I don’t know,’ I say. ‘What if I hold you back? If I messed up and made you lose, I couldn’t live with myself.’ I stand up from the lounger, walking to the edge of the flower gardens, staring at the surrounding city.

Lights twinkle in the buildings around me. The air is heavy from the rain earlier. The silence of the night is deafening to a girl who can’t stop her thoughts as they spin through my head like a tornado. Honestly, I prefer listening to Dax talk about stars.

‘Right now, I’m just a pain in your butt. What if you feel that way about me as your assistant too?’

‘I don’t feel that way about you now.’

I heave a sigh. ‘I’m selfish, Dax. I’d sink you.’

‘No, you’re not. You’re temporarily lost. It happens to all of us. You can be whoever you want to be.’ He says it in such an upbeat way, as if it’s an absolute fact. ’But you’re right,’ he says. ‘You came here to start over, not help me with my dreams.’

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