Page 24 of The Rough Ride

“Did you do this because I couldn’t,” he inhaled sharply, “wouldn’tgive you a child?” He ran his hands down his face.

Her chin lifted. “Her name is Ella, and she wasn’t planned. She just happened.” Oh wow, that soundedreallybad. Desperation flooded her mind. She couldn’t even begin to remember the speech she’d rehearsed.

“Just happened.” His voice drifted off. “Did you give birth or adopt her?”

“No adoption, the old-fashioned way.” The loop on the corner of the pot holder broke, and Liz tossed it on the counter. It wasn’t the only thing broken tonight, judging by the pain etched across his face. She straightened and took a deep breath. At some point, he’d have to look at her, and she braced herself.

“Ella is my greatest achievement in life, Nick. She’s way beyond the Purple Heart I received. She gave me a reason to pull myself together after Iraq. I hope I’m half the mother to her that Arlene has been for me.”

“So, this is who your mom has been babysitting?”

“Yes.” Her cheeks warmed again at his mention of her lie of omission.Shit.

“And this is why you wouldn’t stay at my place the other night?” He traced a finger down Ella’s chubby cheek.

“Yes. Well, I’m still nursing her. Sleepovers have to be planned in advance.” Did she just call staying at his place a sleepover?Like they were eight?Her boobs started to ache, and she crossed her arms.

He stood, shoved his hands in his trouser pockets and gazed at Ella. “She’s pretty—looks just like you.”

“You think so? I don’t see the resemblance at all. I guess she looks like herself. It’s amazing how fast she’s growing.” Oh God help her, she was babbling. Liz swallowed hard. SeeingNick and Ella in the same room brought tears to her eyes. She’d dreamed of it. But, good lord, not with this kind of introduction.

He gave a sardonic laugh. “Is this why you wanted an open relationship?” He turned around and pierced her with a stare.

It was worse than she expected. His eyes cut into hers like slashes of watery, dark flint. His lips were a grim line.

All of her good reasons crumbled into flimsy excuses. “Absolutely not. I didn’t plan to get pregnant. I wanted the open relationship for you. I couldn’t commit knowing that you didn’t want children. Kids are a big deal, Nick. Maybe there was someone out there who felt just like you.”

He nodded. “So, Ella is why you’ve been avoiding me since I came home? The reason behind us always meeting at parks and restaurants?”

“Yes. I wasn’t ready to tell you.” Fat, sorrow-laden tears rolled down her cheeks. She whisked them away. The betrayal on his face cut her to the core. “I couldn’t figure out how or when to say something.”

He shook his head. “You had to work really hard to keep me from knowing about her.”

Understatement of the year.“I know. I’m so sorry. I had my reasons, but right now, I’m not proud of them.” The tension in the room was stifling. Even Ella felt it, and her lip quivered.

“I kept the baby awake to meet you, but it’s past her bedtime. It’ll take me about fifteen minutes to um, get her settled. Will you wait?”

He fixed a dark gaze on her. “I’m a combat soldier, Liz. So are you. I’m not about to cut and run with a skirmish at hand.”

A rush of dread—or was it hope?—bolted through her stomach. If he left, she could nurse her wounds in privacy. If he stayed, she’d need to face—what? An ultimatum?

She wiped her clammy hands on her pants. “I don’t want to fight, Nick.”

He nodded. “Me either. But an explanation would be damn helpful right about now.” He strolled to the counter and started opening the bottle of wine.

“I’ll be back. It’ll take me ten or fifteen minutes.” She scooped Ella from her play seat as the baby broke into a full wail. Liz grabbed a pacifier from the kitchen table.

“By the way, who’s her father? Do I know him?” The cork popped, and Nick filled a glass halfway.

“Let’s talk about that when I get back.” Ella’s crying increased, and Liz hurried toward the hallway. But she heard his clipped reply.

“Damn straight, we’ll be talking about Ella’s daddy when you get back.”

Nick tossed backthe glass of wine and poured more for him and one for Liz.

Ella’s existence explained a lot. Like the ever-present dark shadows under Liz’s eyes. She’d looked tired every time he’d seen her since returning from Iraq. And no wonder. She’d been working twelve hours a day and went home to another full-time job, day after day. As much as he wanted to beat the shit out of Ella’s daddy, he hoped the guy was involved and gave Liz a break once in a while.

Damn.He shoved the garlic bread into the oven and leaned against the counter sipping his glass of wine. If Ella’s father was in the picture, why did Liz have sex withhimthe other night? That wasn’t like her.

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