Page 10 of Careless Whisper

“Post-op day two from mitral valve replacement,” I replied, not looking at him. “Sudden hemodynamic collapse. Beck’s triad. Classic tamponade. I was prepping for bedside pericardiocentesis.”

“Echo?” he barked in response.

“It’s en route.”

The monitor flatlined.

“Code!” someone shouted. I think it was me.

I backed away as the Lucas device was wheeled in. Tanya moved to deploy it, hands shaking.

“Dr. Graham, field’s prepped. Tray’s ready.” I couldn’t keep the urgency out of my voice. “It’s tamponade—he needs the tap now.”

“I know what he needs,” Elias snapped.

I looked at him then—and regretted it because hiseyes skimmed over me like I was a stain he couldn’t scrub out.

The echo arrived, and he took the probe. “Blood in the sac,” he confirmed.

Needle in. Dark red aspirated.

The monitor beeped.

Sinus!

He saved the patient, but I’d already started it. Not that he’d say it. Or even acknowledge it, I thought almost petulantly.

He didn’t speak to me afterward. Just walked out, tossing his gloves in the bin like the code had been nothing more than a Thursday afternoon nuisance.

I went back to the nurse’s station and tried to shake it off.

“Why was he so rude to you?” Tanya asked me later.

“Who?” I feigned ignorance.

“Dr. Graham,” she hissed.

I shrugged. “He’s like any other attending.”

“No, Reggie, he was…fine with me. It wasyouhe was?—”

“Hey, look, I need to get these to Cindy.” I waved the labs I had in my hand.

Was Elias an ass to me?Yes.

Was he like some asshole attendings?Yes.

Was his assholery directed only toward me?Also, yes.

But I didn’t do the work for him; I did it for the patients.

Even as much as I could pretend, it still stung. How pathetic was I that I wanted him to pat my head and say, ‘Good nurse’?

I dropped the labs off with Cindy, who studied me carefully. “You handled that well.”

“Handled what?” I asked nonchalantly.

Cindy knew what was happening in her ward with her nurses anywhere in the hospital—and in great detail.

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