Page 281 of As the Rain Falls
I’m okay.
I’m o—
LUCIA'S DIARY ENTRIES: OCTOBER 2013
Page 1
I hate my dad. I just hate him. I hate what he does to Beckett. How he treats him. Today is my brother’s birthday, and he just ruined it. He ruinseverything.
I hate that I feel like I am his daughter. Beckettneversounds like him but I always do. I just hate hate hate.
Everything. Every. Single. Thing.
Page 2
I saw Antony kissing her underourtree. I am never ever going to forgive him for it!!!!
I hate him now, too.
Page 3
I had this weird dream whereitwasn’t happening toher. It was happening tomeinstead. I had to watch it throughthe window all over again, and no one helped me when I screamed. It makes me want to kill myself, or kill him.
I know it’s not right to wish death on someone like that, but I don’t think it’s entirely bad if it’s him. He deserves it. Nathaniel Rivera deserves every single bad thing that’s coming for him and more.
MORE THAN WORDS
Beckett
FEBRUARY, 2017
It’s long past midnightwhen someone knocks on the front door. It takes me a second to register the quiet sound; the knock is soft and hesitant.
Groggily, I get up to answer it, my t-shirt rising up to my mid-chest. I quickly pull it down, trying to tame my wild hair.
When I open the door, Cassandra is standing there, her eyes bloodshot. She hesitates, like she’s about to speak but can’t find the words.
“Can I…” she trails off, swallowing hard. Her gaze flies past me, checking to see if I’m alone. Pepé is asleep, lying on the kitchen floor. “Can I please stay here tonight?”
A shallow breath escapes past her lips, the kind someone makes before they start to cry. She scratches her arm nervously, like she’s been caught doing something wrong.
“I might wake Nathaniel up if I try to open the door,” she explains. “I think I saw him sleeping in the living room. He must be waiting for me to come home, and I…”
The statement hangs between us, cold and heavy, like a deadly sentence. I take a step back, opening the door wide and making enough space to let her in.
She barely makes a full step before her knees give out.
“Cassandra!” I catch her before she hits the ground, lifting her up bridal style. Her head rolls, finding the curve of my shoulder, her cold nose pressing against my warm skin.
“I’m sorry. I have… I have nowhere else to go.”
“It’s okay.” I shut the door with my foot. The lock never opens from the outside anyway. She weighs nothing in my arms, almost too fragile. I press my lips to her temple, feeling her shiver against me. “I’ve got you, baby.”
“I’m…” Cassandra’s gaze locks onto mine, her fingers struggling to find something to hold. Her lashes are wet. “I would’ve called, but my phone was dying, and every store was closed, and—”
“I’m not upset about that.” I adjust my hold, carefully stepping up the narrow staircase. It’s cramped, but we make it work. “I told you to come to me whenever you needed to, didn’t I?”
Cassandra reeks of… sex.
