Page 114 of North Is the Night
I search his face. I see the pain there, the vulnerability. I know in his eyes, I’m perfect. Siiri has always been just the same, measuring all her own faults against what she perceives as my perfection. It’s a heavy crown for anyone to wear.
“I stole something once,” I whisper.
He raises a dark brow. “What?”
“Siiri’s mummi makes the most delicious blackberry pies. Once, when she was busy in the garden, I stole one right off her table. I didn’t even share it with Siiri. Her brother Onni caught me. I had to kiss his cheek so he wouldn’t tell Siiri or their mummi what I’d done.”
He blinks.
“So... I’m a thief,” I say with a shrug. “I’m a thief and a liar, and I permitted a boy to kiss me so he would keep my secrets. Nobody’s perfect, my lord.”
Slowly, his mouth tips into a grin. Then he barks out a laugh so loud it makes me jump.
“It wasn’t meant to be funny,” I mutter, embarrassment rising.
His laughter dies and he holds out his hand. “Come here.”
Hesitant, I step forward, taking his hand. He pulls me in, wrapping his arms around me. With his chin resting against my temple, I can still feel the laughter he holds in his chest. “So, this young man took advantage of you? Do you want me to kill him?”
“No,” I cry, pulling away. I’m mortified until he smirks. “It’s not funny,” I say, slapping his chest. “Kaisa was furious, and Siiri took the blame. She was splitting firewood for a week. I’ve never told anyone. Only Onni knows.”
He laughs again, smoothing my hair back from my face. “Listen to me, you wild and dangerous creature. You will never have to resort to stealing pies again. And as your husband,” he adds, the growl in the word making my stomach flip, “if I ever hear of you being forced to trade romantic favors with a man so he’ll keep your secrets, I’ll find the brigand and string him up by the ears on my palace walls.”
I purse my lips. “That won’t be necessary, my lord.”
His smile falls as he lets himself look at me with the same unabashed curiosity as the raven. I hold still as he lifts a hand, brushing his thumb over my lips. “Call me by my name.”
The thought of saying his name excites me as much as it makes me nervous. Since I pulled him from the tree, I’ve been playing a careful game of pretending he’s someone else. But he can’t be a handsome man from a neighboring village with a name that strikes fear into the hearts of all Finns.
He leans closer, our foreheads almost touching. “Say it.”
Heart in my throat, I whisper his name. “Tuoni.”
His control snaps, and I’m in his arms. Our lips meet in a pressing kiss. Gods, I want to sink into this feeling. I want to feel safe. I want to feel cherished, protected. His hand slips beneath the edge of my fur-lined cloak, his fingertips grazing the bare skin exposed in the V of my woolen dress.
I hiss and pull back, pushing on his shoulders with both hands. “Stop.”
Cool air rushes between us, and I take a halting step backwards. My heart is beating so loudly in my chest, I’m sure he can hear it. He’s looking at me. He’s always looking at me. I close my eyes, shaking my head. “I need... this is...”
He takes a step closer, his hands brushing down my arms as if to comfort me. “This is madness,” I murmur. “I still don’t know you. I don’t know anything about you, and I’ve never—” I blush, letting my truth fall unspoken.
He doesn’t advance, but neither does he step away.
My eyes flutter open to see him still looking at me.
“You said you weren’t afraid of me,” he challenges.
“I’m not.”
“Do you now believe I mean to harm you, wife?”
“No.”
“And do you believe I would ever allow another to do you harm?”
“You did,” I cry, pulling away. “These witches have done nothing but scare me and torture me, starve me—”
“I was bound,” he replies. “I did everything I could to protect you, to protect all the girls, even in my cursed state. I risked everything to curtail Tuonetar’s power. For the longest time, Ilosteverything. There are things that cannot be recovered, Aina. Wounds that cannot heal, lives that can never be made whole again.”
