Page 49 of Her Big Fat Hunky Billionaire Boss

Damian rounded on Kat. “No. This was not somemistake.” He spat out the word. “It was a calculation. A way to get out of taking responsibility. Just like—” Damian stopped before he said too much.

Kat stood and walked to him. She put her hand on his shoulder. “Like what?”

Damian sighed. It didn’t matter if he told her. Who was she going to tell? She lived in the middle of nowhere. He scrubbed his hand over his face. “My father didn’t die of cancer last year. He committed suicide.” His throat constricted.

Kat sucked in a breath. “Oh, no. That’s terrible.”

Pain stabbed through him as the memories from last year flashed through his mind. The awful way he had to lie to the public, to cover up what his father had done, and to make the company look good. The way he’d had to act sad when inside he was consumed with his anger.

His father had never really been there for him, and this was his last act of abandonment. The last twist of the knife he stuck in Damian’s gut. And all his anger just multiplied his guilt, because he knew he shouldn’t feel that way about it.

Kat put her arms around him and drew him close to her. He buried his face in her hair, swallowing back the emotion threatening to overpower him. “He chose the easy way out,” Damian whispered. He hadn’t ever told anyone how he felt. How could he? He couldn’t let anyone know he blamed his father. He was horrible for feeling that way.

“He was suffering,” she whispered. “You can’t know what he was going through.”

Yes, she was right. His father had been tortured. The signs of depression had been there, no one had put it together until it was too late. But knowing his father had been under mental duress made him feel even guiltier for his own anger.

There was a time when Damian had wanted to do the same, take the easy way out, but he didn’t. He faced his bad decisions head-on. He lived through the agony. His father gave up and deserted his family.

“I know I shouldn’t blame him,” Damian said. “It’s just so hard not to feel angry and abandoned.”

Kat reached up and placed her hands on his face, forcing him to look her in the eyes. He found compassion in her gaze. “You’re hurting. Those feelings are natural. I understand what you’re going through.” She blinked back tears. “I felt the same way when my mother’s condition grew so bad we had to move her to the facility. I was angry. I blamed her. But I knew it wasn’t her fault, so then I felt guilty for that anger.”

Damian nodded. “That’s exactly how I feel.”

Kat laid her head on his chest, her arms pulling him to her again. “It’s okay to be angry. I’ve learned that you can’t change those feelings. You just have to realize they are normal, and accept them for what they are…part of the grieving process.”

Damian swallowed. She was right. About all of it. “Yes,” he whispered.

“You don’t have to feel guilty.”

“Do you want to know the last thing I said to him?” Damian kept going before he couldn’t get the words out. “I told him I would be glad when he was dead.” He clenched his fists into her hair, emotion choking him. “Who says that?”

“Damian…”

He pulled away from her, his loathing for himself too strong. He turned, unable to face her. “I don’t deserve your sympathy.”

Kat reached for him, taking his shoulders and forcing him to look at her. “We all say things we regret. You had no idea what was going to happen.”

He broke her gaze. “It’s not only that. If you knew what I’d done… What my father couldn’t forgive me for.” He stopped, his pain too great to go on.

“You’re a good person. No matter what happened.”

The urge to tell her grew in him. She should know who he really was. “My accident. I was drag racing. It was stupid and illegal, but I was an angry young man. I…my best friend died that day. And it was my fault.”

Kat shook her head. “It wasn’t. You didn’t crash on purpose.”

“No, but I disobeyed my father. I made a stupid decision. And my best friend paid for it with his life.” He exhaled, a great weight lifting from his shoulders. He’d never talked about that day to anyone.

“People make mistakes.” Kat wrapped her arms around him. “No one is above that. You had a terrible experience, but it’s made you stronger.”

Damian swallowed. Sweet Katherine. Of course, she would dismiss the ugly side of him. He ran his thumb down her cheek and she closed her eyes. He cupped her face. “You have a tender heart,” he whispered. Before he could stop himself, he pressed his lips to hers.

Her lips parted and an energy surged through him. Kat saw past his weaknesses. He let her see inside of him, and she hadn’t backed away. She’d accepted him. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her to him. His lips moved against hers, the kiss growing intense. A hunger for her flowed through him.

She suddenly pushed away from him, breaking the contact. She shook her head. “No,” Kat said under her breath, her hand flying to her lips.

Her rejection stung. He turned away from her, clenching his hands into fists. “Right. Sorry. I got carried away I guess.”

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