Page 60 of Because You Loved Me

She nods. “Yes. I’ll try some of yours.”

“Then if you love it, you can order the whole lobster next time.”

She looks down at the table. “Sure. Next time.”

A tension that wasn’t there before sneaks in between us, and I stare at her. I got the feeling last night that Kiki’s not planning on staying long when I told her I ordered her a phone. And now it’s back. It makes me want to know more about her. I want to know why she’s on Willow Island. She told me a little bit, but now I want to know the details.

“Unless you hate the food here,” I joke, trying to break up the awkwardness.

She smiles. “I’m sure I won’t.”

I study her. “You mentioned the other day you’re here looking for someone. Can I ask, is it your biological mother?”

Her eyes widen and she motions with both hands. “No. That’s not it.”

“Then, who?”

“No one, really.” Kiki fiddles with her napkin. She’s extremely nervous now, and I don’t understand. “I’m trying to find myself,” she finally says quietly.

This makes more sense. I’ve gotten the feeling that Kiki doesn’t know who she is. But it’s more than that. I get the sense that she doesn’t like who she is, which tears me apart, especially when I can see all the good in her.

“I get that.” I want to reach across the table and take her hand, but I don’t. She’s made it clear she doesn’t want that kind of relationship with me.

The server comes and takes our orders. We sit and look out at the sunset. My phone chimes and I pick it up. Micah texted.

I got into Georgia State!

I grin. “Oh, thank goodness.”

Kiki cocks her head to the side. “What’s that about?”

“Micah got accepted into Georgia State. He was worried. All his friends already got acceptance letters, including Cricket. He thought maybe he applied too late.”

Kiki smiles. “I’m so glad. Tell him I’m happy for him.”

I’m with Kiki and we’re both so happy for you!

He sends me back a series of emojis, and I don’t totally understand what he means, but I get the impression he’s happy.

We sit in silence for a few moments before Kiki clears her throat. “What’s something you’ve always wanted to do, but have never done?”

“That’s a great question. I guess I’ve always wanted to do some traveling.”

“Where would you go?”

“Alaska. The photos make it look so beautiful.”

She shakes her head. “And cold. You’d leave this perfect island for someplace like that?”

I laugh. “It’s spring right now. Just wait until August hits. You’ll want to go to Alaska too.”

“I prefer the heat. The cold just gets into my bones and makes me shiver.” She rubs her arms.

“Got it.” I pick up my glass and motion toward her. “Don’t take Kat to Alaska.” I’m in the middle of taking another drink when I realize what I just implied, and I choke, setting my class quickly down. “I mean, not that we’d ever go on trips together or anything. I didn’t mean to imply…” I stop talking, my face heating to a thousand degrees.

She stares at me for a second, then bursts out laughing. “Change it to the Bahamas and I’m in.”

I smile at her, relieved that she didn’t take it the wrong way. Our food comes. I grab a small fork, and I pry some lobster outof the tail. I dip it in the butter and stretch it toward Kiki. “Try the lobster.”

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