Page 55 of The Bratva's Arranged Virgin Bride
Chapter 30 - Nat
Normally, after our moments of passion, I was riding on a cloud for days, but this time, I felt oddly out of place, like everything Kolya and I did together was just a big show. We acted like everything was fine, but we both knew it wasn’t. I could tell when he smiled at me suggestively, asking me to wait up for him, that something was wrong.
At least he told me where he was going, if I could believe him. I should have kept on top of my decoy phone, which he never did find in his car, but the battery was long dead, and I couldn’t track him.
I either had to trust him, or not.
I wasn’t tired, so I decided to try starting another painting. The light would be crap at that time of night, but for some reason, despite my uneasy mood, or maybe because of it, I felt like I could really get something down on the canvas for a change.
At least until I noticed the profile of myself was gone. The easel it had been resting on, waiting to be finished, was empty, and it wasn’t in the stack with the other unfinished paintings, either. It was just gone.
Did he think I wouldn’t notice? So much for showing me how beautiful he thought I was. All lies, just more lies. Was he running out on me once again? Because I suddenly had the feeling I had seen the last of him, and once again, I was left with nothing but a gaping hole in my chest.
No. Wrong. I still had my plan, and it was a good one. This time, I would be the one leaving him with nothing. And his damn annoying partner, too. If he thought I was going to blissfully divert all the profits from our—mygallery, he couldgo to the same place I was sending Kolya. They could both rot together.
Well, I didn’t feel like painting anymore, that was for sure. I had never felt so bereft in my life. It was like I had been completely wrung out. As much as I wouldn’t have been able to stand looking at Kolya at that moment, I wished he was there with me just so I could yell at him.
Oh hell. As mad as I was, I still wanted him near.
I still wanted him.
That made my anger turn inward, because I couldn’t figure out how things went downhill so fast. It all came down to trust. Neither of us had enough, if any, for the other. And fear. Not for my life or my safety. No matter what my uncles and cousins thought, I wasn’t in any physical danger from Kolya. But my feelings were in peril all over again. I couldn’t bear the kind of pain I felt when I found out he was gone the first time. Every time he left, I worried I’d never see him again, when I should have been hoping for it.
God, I wish I could be a cold-blooded machine like Masha. I was grateful she had forgiven me, though she was a little standoffish at our lunch. When I asked her how she thought I should proceed, Masha said I should get my heart out of it.
Notkeepit out of it. My astute cousin had my number and knew my heart was already involved. As much as I tried to play it off as not being a problem, I don’t think I did a good job of convincing her. I couldn’t even convince myself.
My damn heart was in it. And once again, it was hurting.
What did I have left? The one thing that still drove me was the gallery. I gave that place my blood, sweat, and tears. I was in charge of everything. I had the keys, the bank accounts,all the artists’ info. It wouldn’t take me long to clear him out, and then…
What?
Take the money and run, never to see my family again? Ha, I’d hate that, and they’d find me within a week. Probably less. I could take the money and just… go home.
The thought of running and hiding behind my family didn’t sound appealing. Once I was back with them, they’d see it as a green light to destroy Kolya. But wasn’t that what I wanted? By doing exactly what he did to me, I’d get my revenge. He’d be humiliated and furious, helpless to retaliate. Why not let my uncles clean up what remained?
But Arkadi might get swept up in it, too, which meant Mila would suffer as a result. I was still angry and hurt at her betrayal, but maybe, just maybe, they were keeping that info from me for my own good? Look what getting put in a position to get my revenge had done to me, after all. I was miserable.
Mila knew me better than anyone else. There was no amount of anger in the world that would let me put her in such a tight spot. Arkadi truly adored my aunt, and if he was working with his brother now, who knew what lies Kolya might have fed him to get him to agree to it.
The only other choice was to scrub all traces of myself from the gallery operation and then put the law on his trail once I cleaned him out. It seemed low down—no one in the Bratva would work with the police unless it was a life-or-death situation. But it was the only way to keep my family out of it and keep Mila safe. Once everything was settled, I could go home and try to forget about it all.
That plan would take more work, but since I was all alone and not doing anything but stewing anyway, I decided to head to the gallery to get started.
