Page 30 of Get Even

There was a pretty good crowd tonight, maybe forty or so people, but it often built up as the night went on so it was better to have a middle slot – something the staff usually accommodated for me because I was here every week.

I didn’t like to drink alcohol before singing so I only grabbed a water as Liv ordered some fruity cocktail that was the house special and Kat winked at us from the other end of the bar. If she was lucky then maybe she was on the early shift and could hang out once she was finished – for the time being she could keep Liv company well enough though.

“Jamie!” Billy called as he saw me sitting at the bar with Liv, his eyes were wide and his skinny hands clutched his chest in apparent relief. “Our usual opener hasn’t turned up and we need to get going. Do you think you could…?”

Oh god, opening? There was pretty much nothing as nerve wracking, it set the precedent for the whole night – you were either the most memorable or quickly forgotten about if what followed was better. Not that I was really here to be remembered, this was more of a catharsis for me, but I still didn’t want anyone to hate my performance. Nerves kindled in my belly and my hands shook unexpectedly. I hadn’t had pre-show jitters for a while.

“I don’t know Billy, you know I prefer to go in the middle–”

“Please?” He interrupted, mopping at the sweat on his forehead with a handkerchief and honestly I hadn’t known people still carried those. “You owe me for the other night.”

Fuck. I knew that pitcher of beer was going to come back and haunt me.

“Fine,” I muttered, standing up and signaling to Kat to keep an eye out for Liv.

There wasn’t much of a backstage area, just a seat next to the few steps on the side of the stage that led to the center. I placed my water down on the seat and took my guitar out of its case. I wasn’t really that great with instruments in general, but I could play enough to give myself a decent accompaniment and that was all I really needed.

I generally preferred to stand when I sang, so I ignored the chair on the stage and instead slid my guitar strap over my shoulder so I could still play. The lights dimmed a little and a short cheer went out. I gave no intro, just strummed the first chord and lost myself as the sound echoed out over the people drinking and chatting. Some stared up at me expectantly, others played pool or were making out in semi-dark booths. I put them all out of my head and sang the opening to my arrangement of Doja’sSo High.

The crowd quieted as I sang and the two stage lightsThe Boxhad were in my eyes, making the faces look like shining stars and I was relieved I couldn’t see their expressions as my thumb skipped over a string it wasn’t supposed to. Something about going first today had me more nervous and on edge than usual. Normally I could lose myself to sensation, relaxing and just singing. Today felt a little different. It might also have been that I’d spent ages on making this arrangement work and I hoped it paid off. Instead of singing the chorus to Doja I hit a slightly discordant chord and sang the hook forHigh Enough, melding the songs together.

A whoop sounded and that was all the encouragement I needed. I sank into the words – I’d picked the songs for more than just their compatibility for a remix. It felt like it had never been clearer to me that some addictions could be more dangerous than drugs. People were often one of the hardest things to be hooked on.

My thoughts turned first to Aaron, then Ryan and settled finally on my mother as I finished my song. She probably knew more than anyone about addiction – she’d tried it all and it wasn’t a life I wanted to be a part of. Ironic then that I had ended up with Aaron, who was just as much of a mess as my mom, and Taylor who seemed to be high all the time lately. I’d lost count of the times that Aaron had shown up to meet me, blue eyes fogged with whatever he’d taken that day and I’d just gone along with it. Hindsight, I guess, was a bitch.

I had half-expected Liv to rush up to me after I got off the stage – she was generally a pretty peppy person and while that might have grated on me coming from anyone else, I actually respected her more for going through what she had and still being unfalteringly positive. I glanced about for her as I grabbed my water but couldn’t make her out through the crowd of people jostling at the bar. Kat looked flustered, her normally neat hair had curls escaping from her careful bun and when she caught my gaze she gave me a helpless look. Clearly she didn’t know where Liv had got to either.

Before I could make my way back to the last spot I’d seen her, a well-dressed man stepped into my path and I stopped before I crashed into him.

“Sorry,” he said with a smile that showed even, white teeth. “Didn’t mean to almost knock you over. I just wanted to say I loved your cover, you have a great voice.”

I smiled at him, he looked a little older than me but still young, maybe mid-late twenties. His shirt collar was unbuttoned and his jeans were tight, he looked like he’d stopped in at the bar after a long day selling houses or something.

“Thanks so much, I appreciate it. Sorry, I’ve got to go and find my friend,” I gave him another polite smile before moving around him to search for Liv. She should have been easy to spot, pink seemed to be her signature color and today she had been wearing a pink velvet mini dress – complete with matching choker. There was actually a lot of color in her wardrobe and it seemed like a deliberate choice, like maybe she hadn’t even had the freedom to pick out her own clothes before, or maybe not the balls. Either way, I was happy for her. It was funny really, we should have been polar opposites –my wardrobe was more grunge than girly and I generally gravitated more towards red, black and purple than pink. Yet, we clicked. I guessed we balanced each other out.

I spotted a flash of hot pink and hurried in that direction, finally spotting Liv near the restroom. Her color was high in her cheeks but the rest of her face was completely drained, leaving her normally bronzed skin ashy. I sat my cup of water down on the bar and bit my lip as my eyes found hers.. She’d swept her hair into a half-up style that was trendy and some asshole had a hold of her high pony. I didn’t recognize him, so I’d guess he wasn’t a regular, but his biceps were large and his face was leering as he leaned closer to her. Couldn’t we have just one night out without some stupid motherfucker getting handsy?

The guy didn’t even notice me approach, but thankfully Liv did and a look of relief so strong it almost made me cry passed across her face. I quickly thrust forward before he could notice me, stepping hard on the inside of his foot and felt my chunky platform squash something that I hoped hurt. The guy yelled and let go of Liv’s hair, stumbling slightly andholy shit. How was this guy still getting served? He stank to high heaven.

His face turned red and spittle formed at the corners of his mouth as he spun to me just as a large hand grabbed him and a body maneuvered between us. I stumbled back a step, grabbing for Liv’s hand and holding her to me while she shook. Button-down had a hold of the guy’s shoulder and had pressed him back against the wall outside of the restroom entrance.

Xander’s broad back stood between them and Liv and me. I wasn’t sure what to make of his sudden appearance. It looked like maybe button-down had followed me over, which was a little weird, or maybe he had just simply been in the right place at the right time. Xander though… I wondered if maybe he had been keeping an eye on Liv. If so, he’d done a pretty shitty job if he was only just stepping in.

I threw a quick glance around the bar to see if Ryan was there too but couldn’t see him or Kit’s signature blue hair, a strong surge of relief filling me when I became certain Ry wasn’t there hearing me sing. I wasn’t sure where we’d left things earlier but I was fairly sure he wasn’t mad at me anymore. Mostly. Still, whether he’d show up to the mixer on Friday remained to be seen.

“It’s alright,” I murmured to Liv, nonsensical words to soothe her as she trembled in my arms. “Thanks for your help,” I said to the guys, “I take it you can let the manager know what happened? I need to get her home.”

Xander turned to us, brown eyes soft on Liv as he nodded and brushed a strand of hair out of her face and cupped her jaw. “You’re safe. We won’t let anyone hurt you, okay?”

It was probably the most words I’d heard Xander say in a row and Liv seemed shocked as she stared at him and slowly nodded. Her shaking had stopped at least and I let go of her body but held onto her hand tightly as I gave one last look of thanks to the guys before heading past the bar to leave.

I waved for Kat’s attention and gestured toward the door so that she knew we were leaving. Luckily I still had my guitar slung over my shoulder so we could head straight out. I supposed in a pinch it would have made a good weapon, but more than anything it made me sad that we had to think about everyday objects so clinically, everything reduced to two columns:could save my lifeanduseless.

I could see Kat talking to Billy behind the bar and his eyes rose to us in concern. For all his quirks, he took care of the people on his premises and I knew that asshole wouldn’t be back here again. Ever. Billy nodded at Kat and she threw down her apron and pushed through the tables to meet us.

“What happened?” she said and I let Liv explain as we strode for the door, the cool air outside barely registering.The Boxhad always felt like a safe space for me and I hated that some drunk idiot had managed to take some of that security away, but more than anything I wanted Liv to be okay. I should have told Billy I couldn’t do the opening slot. Kat should have kept a better eye on her. But we just hadn’t expected it to get so busy so fast, it normally wasn’t really crowded until at least eight-thirty – but there was no excuse. If we had done more then maybe he wouldn’t have gone after Liv.

“Stop,” Liv said as we passed under a street light.

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