Page 29 of A Moment for Us
I move to him, my hand pressed against his chest, feeling the thrum of his heartbeat. “What does that mean?”
“I’m not asking you to love me, I’m just asking you not to leave tonight.”
I may love him. I may never be able to lie to myself that I want the entire fucking world from Josh, but I’m not naïve enough to believe I’ll ever have it. That’s my cross to bear.
“Don’t . . .” My hand falls, and I turn toward the door.
“I’m not going to beg you,” I say. “I deserve better than that. If you don’t want me, then go.”
I feel him behind me, his hand moves to my stomach. “I want you. God, I fucking want you.” My eyes close, heat flooding through my veins as I feel his lip touch the back of my neck. “I want something that is far better than I should ever get to touch.” Another kiss, now a bit to the left. “Tell me I can’t have it.”
If he were any other man in the world, I would. I clench my teeth together, knowing I’ll never deny myself the opportunity to have him touch me.
His hand moves up, cupping my breast. My head falls back to his shoulder as he moans against my neck.
“Delia, tell me to stop.”
I can’t tell him that. I want to weep at the fact that I know those words won’t leave my lips. Instead of crying or feeling sadness, I step forward, his hand falling away. I started this with him. I decided that my heart could handle this insane agreement. Josh has been a dream to me, something that would never be attainable. He won’t think of the stupid future that I do, but that’s not his issue, it’s mine.
Joshua Parkerson has given me no false pretenses, and I jumped into this anyway.
There’s not a chance in hell I’m jumping out.
I want him far too much. I love him even though I shouldn’t, and I can’t tell him no because it’s not what I want.
Both of us are breathing heavy. “Come inside,” I say, and his eyes widen.
“No.”
“No?”
He runs his hands through his hair. “You had a migraine, and . . . I’m a fucking bastard.”
“No, you’re only a bastard if you leave me now.”
“You don’t deserve this.”
I laugh once. “I don’t deserve to feel desired? Wanted? Sexy? I don’t deserve to have someone see me that way?”
Josh’s lips part, and he steps forward. “You are more desirable and sexier than any woman in this world. You have no idea how much I want you. I walk around here, trying to come up with ridiculous reasons to have you again.”
Oh, those words, I’ve seared them in my head and plan to call on them many times in the future.
“Then come inside and show me.”
“Not now. Not with you having a migraine.”
There’s a lot wrong with my head, but the migraine is the least of it. I reach my hand out, resting it on his chest. “Don’t make me ask again.”
I watch as the storm rages in his eyes. The desire to do what I’m asking against the fact that I was literally curled in a ball an hour ago in pain.
My head is fine and the only thing I feel is desire.
I want all the tiny seconds I can get, hold on to, and remember after he leaves.
He steps forward, reaching behind me and turning the knob.
And then he lifts me, carrying me inside.
