Page 100 of Forgotten Desires

“Brynn . . .” I can’t even speak because this is beyond my imagination.

“I know, it’s silly, but it’s tomorrow and I think you should ride next to me.”

My eyes widen. “No.”

“Crew!” She leans in, her hands on my arm. “Please! It’ll make the town love you. It’s so special to them and just think of how much fun it’ll be.”

Fun is not exactly the word I was thinking of. “Bee, there’s no way I can run the risk of that being a photo.”

“What? You riding on a float with your wife in a small town? How would that make you look bad? If anything, it would make you look like a doting husband who is completely smitten. Honestly, it can only help show what a great man you are.”

I really doubt that. It’s going to make me look like a fool, but at the same time, I don’t know that I’m going to be able to say no to this woman. “I’m sure the judge will really see it that way.”

Brynn smiles and leans close. “Please.”

“I’m going to need more convincing.”

Her lips are right up against my ear now and she whispers. “I’ll work on that tonight.”

“Yes, you sure will.”

She giggles and then sits back as we head down the road to her family farm. We pass the sign proclaiming Sugarloaf Day and then take the fork over to Brynn’s house. I have to lock my muscles so I don’t give away my nerves about the barn.

I replay my conversation with Ford about her being upset, and I really hope she won’t be. I know she doesn’t want me to spend money on her, but it’s not about that for me, it’s about her being taken care of.

I want things to be easier for her and I have more than enough money to last me six lifetimes.

Her gasp is loud, and her hand grips my arm. “Crew, please tell me you didn’t do this. No, don’t tell me. I know you did. No one else would’ve done this in a week!”

“Before you get pissed at me, let’s remember you want me to ride on the float with you tomorrow.”

“I’m not sure if I want to kiss you or smack you.”

“How about we go see it before you decide?”

Buying some time isn’t a bad idea. She opens her door before Cliff can get there and I follow. Brynn is standing at the start of the path to her new barn, not moving. “If you can bring the bags in, then you’re free to head to the hotel,” I tell Cliff.

“Of course. Good luck with her,” he says with a laugh.

Yeah, I’m going to need it.

I walk over to where she’s standing, staying quiet. Her hand touches mine and she grabs it. When I look to her face, there are tears silently streaming.

Immediately I move, taking her face in my hands. “No tears, Bee.”

She looks up at me, her lip trembling. “No one has ever done things like this.”

“I’m not sure many people get a barn in a week.”

Her laugh is short and she wraps her fingers around my wrist. “I mean everything, Crew. This is just one more in a long line of things you’ve done for me in a very short amount of time. You really don’t have to do any of this. I’ll never be able to give you any of this back.”

“What makes you think I’m at all unhappy with what you give me?” I ask, brushing away a tear. “What makes you think you haven’t done more for me than I can ever do? What makes you think I do anything because I have to? I want to, Brynn. I want to see your face light up. I want your worries to melt away and for me to be the man who does that for you.”

I see her fighting my words, like she always does, thinking she’s undeserving. I will never forgive myself for being one more man in her life who did that. The lack of self-confidence, the belief that she’s not worth fighting for—I partially put that there. I need to erase it and make her see that she’s worth everything.

“You’re making it very hard to keep my heart guarded.”

I lean in, just a breath from her mouth. “Good. I don’t want you guarded, not with me.”

---