Page 133 of Forgotten Desires

I have a lot more to say to my husband, so I’ll just stay away from the light, thank you very much.

“I don’t know if you can hear me, but I’m going to hope you can. I love you so much, Brynlee Knight. Come back to me, sweetheart. I choose you every day, every hour, every minute. I choose you forever, I just need you to wake up.”

I’m starting to think I’m not dead or near a light, but when I go to open my eyes, I can’t. I’m just so sleepy.

I do everything I can to get my muscles to cooperate, but I can’t, so I let the exhaustion take me back to the abyss.

* * *

“And when do we start to worry?” Crew’s voice wakes me a little.

“She’s had a very traumatic surgery, then a complication. I expect her to rest as much as she can. She’s breathing on her own, her heart rate is great. She’s responsive to light and sound. She’s not in a coma, Mr. Knight. I’m not concerned.”

There’s a silent pause. “It’s been two days, Dr. Carr. Two days of resting, as you call it.”

“She awoke once, and that was a great sign. I promise, she’s being given the absolute best care.”

Oh, he’s not going to like that. Nothing is good enough for the people he loves.

“I’m not questioning your level of care. I’m questioning why my wife still hasn’t opened her eyes. Why we’re happy with the fact that she only twitched her hands when you asked her a question.”

“If she didn’t show any signs of response, we’d have cause to worry. Right now, I’m trusting the medicine. I know this is incredibly difficult for you. Believe me, I wish I could change it, but we found and stopped the bleed, and her vitals and labs show that she’s doing much better. Give her some time to heal and get her strength back.”

He sighs heavily and I hear footsteps leave the room. Then there’s pressure on my hand and he laces our fingers together.

“I’ll lend you all my strength.” Crew brushes his lips against mine. “I’ll give you the breath from my lungs, the beat of my heart, just . . . don’t leave me, Bee. Don’t let me go another day without telling you how much I love you and need you. I will fix everything, just come back to me.”

The pain in his voice has me fighting even harder to wake up. I don’t want him to be sad. I know he chooses me. He has since the day he came back into my life, whether I wanted to believe it or not.

I love him. I love him so much that it actually hurts to hear him in pain.

“Crew.” I force my lips open and hope his name comes out.

It must, because I hear him jump to his feet. “Brynn? Baby, wake up.”

I sigh, using whatever strength I can find to turn my head, hoping when I open my eyes this time, it won’t be so bright.

His fingers tighten around mine. “That’s it,” he coaxes. “I just need to see those beautiful brown eyes.”

I lift my lids, and the lights are low. It must be nighttime. “Crew,” I rasp his name again and he brushes my hair back.

“I’m right here, my love. I’m right here.”

His face comes into focus. He looks like shit. His normally trimmed scruff is almost a beard, there are deep circles under his eyes, and his hair is a mess. Crew lifts our entwined hands to his lips and kisses my knuckles.

“Hi,” he says softly.

“Hi.” His forehead drops to our hands, and his anguish is palpable. “What happened?” I ask, the details feeling a little foggy.

“You collapsed, you had a bleed at the incision site. They had to go back in and thank God they were able to stop it. You’ve been semi-conscious for two days, sort of coming in for a moment and then back out. Between all the medications you were on and the anesthesia, it was . . . terrifying.”

I try to clear my throat a little, but it hurts. “Water?”

He nods, reaching over for the cup. I take a small sip and then he kisses my lips. “Brynn, I . . . I love you so much. I’m so sorry that I pushed you. I . . . there’s a lot to say?—”

I bring my hand to his lips. “Shh. I know. I love you too.”

He looks down at me with tear-filled eyes. “You asked me to choose you. There’s no one else in the world I would ever choose over you and Layla.”

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