Page 43 of Forgotten Desires

I grin. “No, should I?”

“Might scare more of them off.”

I laugh and take her hand. “Come on, let me show you the rest.”

We open the other guest rooms on this floor, the gaming lounge, in case she decides she wants to throw darts or whatever. I never go in there. Then I bring her to the primary wing. It’s masculine, because I live here alone, and it’s massive.

Brynlee doesn’t say anything as she walks around the space. There are two bathrooms, two dressing rooms, a sitting area, and floor-to-ceiling windows that look out at Central Park in the bedroom area.

“I get my own bathroom?” she asks.

“I use the smaller one.”

Her brow lifts. “Why?”

“Because I don’t need anything more than that.”

“Crew, you don’t need any of this!”

She’s not wrong, I don’t need it, but I wanted it. I needed to own something that Digger could never touch. This place is the opposite of the brownstone. It’s big, over the top, and is so damn ostentatious it’s basically the definition of the word. It drips of someone with too much money on their hands, and the day I bought it, I felt fucking free.

Everything she ever wanted was in this place and it wasn’t hers.

I walk over to Brynn, incredibly happy that she will be the person who lives in this place with me. She’ll be the woman who can say this was hers, even if only for a while.

“I needed control in a time when I had none. When everything I wanted was out of my reach. I was so fucking angry at her for keeping Layla from me, I needed to punish her. To get something she begged for and to know she couldn’t touch it. I don’t need this space, this many bedrooms, this many bathrooms, but I needed to feel like I had something.”

Her hand reaches up, pushing my hair back. “Did it make you feel better?”

The question isn’t sarcastic, it’s soft and curious.

To be honest with her, to tell her that I felt nothing after it became mine, is an admission I don’t want to make. But this is Brynlee. She’s the girl who knew my most inner demons and never shied away from them.

“I felt alone, with a lot less money.”

Her thumb moves across my stubble. We’re silent, just standing here, her touch is a caress, and I don’t want it to stop.

Brynn’s eyes meet mine. “I’d forgotten about this scar.” She grazes the place where I had stitches after my first collegiate crew race. After we won, one of the oars came loose and hit me in the lip. “I thought I’d memorized you so well that I wouldn’t have forgotten about that detail.”

“There’s nothing about you that I don’t remember.”

She steps back, her hand dropping, and I try to figure out what I said that has her pulling back.

“I don’t think us staying in the same bedroom is smart.”

I run my hand through my hair. “Maybe not, but we can’t sleep apart. While Celeste and Cliff would cut their arms off before ever breathing a word to the press, there are many others who I don’t trust that implicitly. Layla is little and if she notices, and mentions it to anyone, then our entire arrangement would be screwed. We can’t give anyone any possible idea this isn’t real. Too many things can go wrong if we start putting up barriers.”

“Fine, but I have rules.”

I laugh. “I can’t wait to hear them.”

twelve

BRYNLEE

Rules are the cornerstone of my life.

Therefore, the only way this marriage will work is with very set ones.

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