Page 89 of Forgotten Desires

She shakes her head, looking up at me. “It’s not about that for me.”

I look at her, my throat getting tight because I’ve never met anyone like her. People always say they don’t want the money or luxury, but they seldom mean it. Brynlee really doesn’t. She just wants the people she loves to be happy.

And all I want is to make her smile. “I know that, which is why I want to give it to you all the more.”

I turn to the clerk as Brynn is trying to pull me out of the store. “We’ll take the green please, send it to the Four Seasons in my name.”

“Of course, Mr. Knight.”

“Crew!” Brynlee finally gets me outside.

I pull her into my arms and kiss her. “If this is our honeymoon, you will need to accept that I’m going to be ridiculous and buy you whatever I want. I can’t seduce you, Brynn, but I can spoil you.”

Brynn rests her hand on my chest. “We’ve only been married for a short time and already you’ve done too much. The wedding, the coop, this trip, all of it is so sweet, but I have never needed any of it. I could’ve gotten married in my backyard and taken a secondhand coop. If we got on a plane and went to . . . I don’t know . . . Birmingham, I would’ve been happy.”

“Birmingham?” I ask with a chuckle.

“I have no idea why that popped into my head, but it did.” Her fingers play with the button on my shirt. “I’m just saying that I don’t care about your money, I care about you.”

Her words cut me open, leaving me open and exposed. “I never stopped wanting you, Brynlee.” Our eyes are locked and I want her to feel how I feel. “Even when I should’ve. Even when I married another woman. Even when I told myself over and over that there was no way I could fall in love with someone in a week, I still loved you. So, while our marriage and all the things you’ve named may seem like enough, it’ll never express how much I care about you.”

“You’re not allowed to say that,” she says with tears in her eyes.

“Why not?”

“Because I can’t let you love me.”

“If I haven’t figured out a way in ten years to stop, what makes you think I’ll be able to now?”

twenty-two

BRYNLEE

I’m trying to stay grounded and remember all my damn rules, even though this has been the most incredible day of my life.

We finished eating dinneronthe Eiffel Tower with views that took my breath away. In just sixteen hours, we’ve seen so much, thanks to Crew paying to cut the line at pretty much everything.

We went to the Louvre, the Père Lachaise Cemetery, which was the most incredibly beautiful place I’ve ever been, and don’t even get me started on this freaking hotel. We walked the Seine holding hands and he kissed me on the bridge, like I’ve seen in the movies. I’ve probably walked more than I’ve ever walked before and yet, I’m not even tired.

Crew opens the door to the hotel room and the high of the day and all the things we’ve done sort of crash down on me.

I want to talk about the things that happened, put in place the rules we agreed on, remember the hurt that I’ve endured, but I can’t.

The two of us look at each other in the foyer of this ridiculous suite.

Like magnets, we’re pulled to each other. Each step takes us to the next before I’m reaching for him and he’s reaching for me. I’m not sure who kisses who, but it’s intense and I feel it everywhere.

He moves my head to the side, devouring my mouth. I push his suit jacket off and toss my shawl somewhere in the room. My hands go to the buttons on his shirt, and I fumble trying to undo them.

Crew pulls back, both of us panting, and I wrench the fabric apart, causing buttons to fly everywhere. His eyes flash with heat and then he lifts me, walking us to the bedroom.

“Brynn,” he sighs my name as he puts me down. His hands move to the clip in my hair, freeing it. “I want you more than anything, but I’ll stop if you want.”

His fingers move down my neck and over my shoulders.

While he may want me, I need him.

“Don’t stop.” Our mouths are close thanks to the increased height I get from my heels. “Don’t stop at all.”

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