Page 105 of Filthy Love

And that night when he took his seat at Rider’s right-hand side at the sacred church table, he felt a rightness settle into his bones. A belonging and calm he got nowhere else but at this old worn oak table with his boys bantering around it before order was called and business was discussed.

Money, crime, illegal goings on and how to deal with the Russians while slipping under the radar of the cops as always.

Hawk absorbed it silently.

“And before I send you shitheads out into the public to disgrace my club’s good reputation,” Rider said making everyone chuckle and add their ten cents worth of the rep they all had and nothing about it was good. “We gotta welcome this happy fucker back officially. It’s good to have you back on my right at this table, bro.”

“Here, here.” Several said banging the table.

“Not only did he get rid of Hades,” Snake announced with Pride. Grunts of approval rippled around the long table, “he faced off with the Russians and saved sweet little Gia, and now look at him; fucking model of the year. It’s like we got a new person back. Or an alien.” At least some things didn’t change. Hawk stared at king joker who flashed him an unrepentant grin. He was not gonna live this shit down at all.

“Yeah, yeah, let’s move the fuck on. The VP is back, so you ass-monkey’s watch out before I do to you what I did to Hades.” He warned as friendly as he got.

Everyone guffawed and knocked heavy ringed knuckles on the table top. Even Rider was grinning at him, that asshole.

“Aww man, you see this? I’m all a fucking flutter here. He missed the fuck out of us.” Snake said holding a hand to his heart.

And then jokes came to a halt and they dispersed.

Hawk hung back to catch up with Rider.

It would have been the time to tell Rider Hawk was interested in Gia in a way that was more VP doing a favor for his prez and all to do with being obsessed with her.

But he kept his stupid trap shut.

His luck only took him so far, he couldn’t believe he had any at all, what with him being a piece of shit and he might be just as dumb but not so much he’d open his mouth and ruin it by telling Rider and having him bury Hawk in the mountains somewhere for the cats to piss on his unmarked grave before he’d gotten a taste of Gia.

He didn’t like withholding something important from his best friend, the one man to know all his gory secrets and still have his back. The man to find him when he was a teen runaway and offer him food and give him a place to stay and then bring him to the club to prospect, to give him a family and a sense of true belonging.

Wanting to fuck his sister was going against every brotherly oath he swore by when he took his VP patch onto his cut and knew he’d kill for Rider.

More than likely Rider would blow Hawk’s knee caps off and take back his VP cut and kick him out of the club the minute he knew where Hawk’s heart was at.

And the thing was, he knew he’d give it up.

Instantly.

For a chance. One inch of a chance to be Gia’s man, it’d be worth it to give up the one thing that had ever meant something to him.

There was no doubt in Hawk’s mind about that.

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

“Give me a book boyfriend any day. Real men are a big fat disappointment.” – Winter Deseille.

“You shouldn’t be worried considering we’re over and have been for months. I don't care, Chad. It’s still no. It’ll always be no, and you know why, so do us both a favor and lose this number.” The woman behind the U-shaped shiny counter said in an angry whisper into the phone. “You know what you did! Don’t play the forgetful card with me.” Her back turned to preserve privacy, Zara guessed, but it was more than evident she was shaking. The French manicured hand she lifted to her shoulder length icy-gray hair was visibly trembling.

Zara frowned. Not because she’d been waiting several minutes to check out her pile of books this week, but she didn’t like the tone she was hearing in the librarian’s voice.

It was unguarded fear.

And Zara knew all too well how a voice could tremble with anxiety.

Her own belly without warning began to claw-clutch in sympathy and for a crazy second, she wanted to call Rider to come and shield her from listening to this woman’s upset.

Cradling her books tighter, the heavy weight of the hardbacks forgotten, she glanced over her shoulder out of the glass doors. Slider was out in his SUV waiting for her. One signal from her and he’d come instantly.

But that was ridiculous, and this was none of her business.

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