Page 17 of Filthy Love

CHAPTER FOUR

“This was the worst kind of punked…” - Hawk

Hawk could sense in what direction this was heading when the air shifted under him making him lightheaded and he was powerless to stop it.

Beat after beat blood pounded through his rushing ears.

Get out.

Get the fuck out.

She was untainted, and he had irremovable stains.

He wanted her. Not that hedeservedher.

She would have been better asking him to kill someone. That much he could handle.

“Is it such a hard question?” All signs of her joy slipped off her face the longer he kept Gia waiting for an answer. Before he knew it, she left her seat and was standing in front of him. Close enough to touch. Close enough that if he reached out with his nasty hands he could have them snaked under her tiny shirt that hid nothing from his eyes, seeing clearly the outline of her hard nipples.

“I’m going to move my practice to Colorado, so I can be closer to my brother, Zara and the baby.” She went on.

Hawk stared, closing her out just for a second. It was a split second he needed on hearing how near she would be if she did relocate.

Jesus god, he would be driven mad.

She went on like she didn’t know just how much of a brain bleed she was giving him.

“I just thought it would be nice if we could spend time together. You always seem to be running away.” She edged a little smile. Shy and sweet.

He'd always known if he were this near to Gia it would break out both of their beasts. Only, hers has always been the more powerful when it had him wanting to come to heel, to do anything she wanted, to offer up his battered soul for her own keeping.

He'd known it and that's what kept him skulking through the shadows, watching her from afar, not deserving her, because the moment she was right there in touching distance, all his neurons got twisted up and what he'd lived by for ten years went by the wayside.

Rules he'd put in place for himself;don't want the little bit of a thing.It was easy enough yet found it the hardest to adhere to. Something in his brain ... in his chest fought against the rule.

Don't touch her.

You can't offer yourself to her for whatever she needs.

Every rule shit the bed and became obsolete the second she was right there, her beautiful beast in charge. He never quite got used to the buzzing in his belly when she was near. Sometimes it was an addiction, he had to answer to its call, just move closer, it would whisper. Other times, like now, his feet were urging him to fucking move, to get out of there before that thing pounding in his chest got him into trouble.

Why can’t I have her?

Not good enough.Was always the answer.

Because you were destroyed. Was always the follow up. And as much of a selfish, uncaring prick Hawk was, Gia was the one person to somehow have climbed under the spikes of his soul, to make him care whether he hurt her, used her, damaged her in any way with his body and fucked up mind. She was the only one he could leash his selfish wants for.

“No,” he croaked out from around the boulder in his throat. “Are you insane?” His voice was pure fucking rust. “You’re the head shrink, you don’t say shit like that to the likes of me. I’m manipulative, incapable of remorse. Is that the kind of person you want around you?”

The hands hanging loosely at his sides clenched and released, itchy to grab her. As it was his traitorous feet moved him forward until he towered over her, his head anchored down as she looked up.

He was a sick fucking animal.

Leave her alone.

Hecouldn’t.

God, her lips were perfect and pouty. He wanted to know if she still tasted the same.