Page 50 of Manhattan Heart

God. Yes. Everything.

Instead I swallow and get my slut side back under control.

“Do we need to have a kid? I mean… like do you want a kid?”

I don’t think I’ve seen him so stumped for words as Gray blinks. He swallows and then says. “That was not what I was expecting. Where’s this coming from?”

Slightly embarrassed, which is stupid because we can talk about anything.

And we’ve had this conversation before.

I lie across his shoulder. His hand goes to my hip and he squeezes slightly.

My hand over his steadily beating heart.My heart.

“The girls were baby talking. Catie says her and Ronan want them soon and then Gabby said she wants at least four. Four, can you imagine? And you know Sena is fifty-nine months pregnant. I guess I thought it was just something we should revisit.”

There’s a beat of silence, his lips at my hairline. “Do you want a baby?”

“I asked you first.”

He chuckles.

“Sweetheart, I’ll give you anything you desire.”

“Tell me honestly, have I held you back from telling me you want kids? I don’t mind what you say.”

I’m slightly terrified of his answer actually.

And the moment I say it, I wonder why the fuck I’ve posed the question. Sometimes barn doors open and horses get out and you can’t get them back.

Not sure how horses relay to babies, but I’m sure there’s a similarity somewhere if I look hard enough.

Gray’s fingers move up and down my hip, heat follows.

“If I ever have kids, I will want them with you. I never thought of having kids with any past relationship.”

I think of his ex…. Whatsherface… okay, fine. Her name is Dahlia. And she happens to be married to my dad now in a funny twist of weirdness. Talk about keeping things in the family. She also has a kid. My half-brother, and yeah, I’ve wondered a time or three what would have happened to our life now if Gray and Dahlia had a kid together years ago.

“Shut up,” I tell him teasingly. “You were a virgin when I got you.”

“Oh, right. I forgot. All that oral skill came naturally to me.”

I don’t need to look at him to know he’s smirking.

I poke him in the belly. “You are a beast.”

He truly is an oral sex master though.

He lifts my hand and touches it to his mouth. “Tell me where this is coming from, India. Do you want a baby?”

I don’t. I know that categorically.

In part it’s because of Jacky.

Losing my brother hurt my soul and it’s never recovered.

I witnessed first-hand the devastation mom went through and call me cowardly, my heart can’t take that kind of pain.

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