Page 30 of Single Girl Rules: Auctioned

“I really don’t think he’s gonna come back.”

“Ghostie wouldn’t dare abandon me. He must be up to something…”I thought back to what had happened just before he left.

I’d told Ghostie the plan was off. Then he asked what wouldhappen if I got auctioned off to a small dicked oligarch. And then I’d toldGhostie that it was okay because at least he’d be waiting to properly satisfyme afterwards.

That’s it!“I know what he’s up to.”

“You do?”

“Yup. He’s working on infiltrating the auction. That way hecan buy us if it looks like some small dicked oligarch is winning the bid. But I’drather him just come back and help us escape. I really wanna win that favorfrom the banana king.” I could think of so many things I’d make that man do…

“I’ll send Simon to try to find him.”

“Good.” I put a few finishing touches on my makeup and thenturned to my girls. They looked smoking hot in their bride squad outfits. AlthoughAsh would look even better if she’d put the heels on. “Ready to party?”

“As in…play boardgames with a fun but sophisticated group of women?”asked Ash.

“Did you learn nothing at the banana party last weekend?”

“What banana party?”

I stared at her. Every time I’d brought it up this week, shealways just pretended like she didn’t know what I was talking about. Exceptwhen she’d had banana juice. Then she was more than happy to talk about all thenaughty things she’d done.

“Please tell me you didn’t hire any strippers for this poorbride.”

“I didn’t.”

“You promise?”

I pulled a stack of Single Girl Rules membership cards out ofthe duffel bag and put my hand on them. “I solemnly swear that I didn’t hireany strippers for this party.”

Ash looked at the cards and then back at me. “I don’t thinkyou’d desecrate the Single Girl Rules like that, so I guess I believe you. But I’mstill suspicious.”

I shrugged. “I really didn’t.”

“So it’s seriously just going to be women doing non-sexybachelorette things?”

“Sure…”

“That was not convincing.”

I winked at her.

“No! Stop that. I know what that wink means.”

“Do you?”

“Yes! It means penises are afoot.”

“Penises on feet?” asked Slavanka. “That sound not sexy.”

“No,” I said. “Penises areafoot.As in…happening or aboutto happen.”

Ash groaned. “I knew it.”

I smiled and pulled the bathroom door open.

It was time to party!

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