Page 35 of Single Girl Rules: HoHoHo

Shit!The sudden movement caught me off guard and Islipped.

I would have been a goner, but Slavanka caught my arm andpulled me to safety just in time. We could just barely hear the bench smash onthe ground eight stories below.

“Girl, you just saved my life,” I said.

“Now I fuck your boyfriend.” She said it like it was somesort of grand reward. But it really wasn’t. She’d hardly feel a thing. And thathad already been the plan. She was doing me a solid here.

Slavanka helped me get the lid off the hot tub. I wanted tojump right in, but first I had to get Chad’s attention. So Slavanka hid in thecorner of the balcony while I ran over and tapped on the glass door.

Chad glanced up from his call. I was all ready for his jaw todrop at the sight of my naked body. But instead he put up his hand and mouthed,“Give me five minutes.”

What the hell?

I pushed my tits against the glass, but he’d already lookedaway. And FUCK THAT GLASS IS COLD. I ran back to the hot tub and jumped in.

I sighed in relief as the hot water brought feeling back tomy limbs and nips.

“He coming?” asked Slavanka as she adjusted her boobs to makethem look perfect.

“He said to give him five minutes. You wanna come jump inwhile we wait so you don’t freeze?”

“No, no,” said Slavanka. “I not cold. My village much colder.This feel like summer.”

Wow, okay.“Should we do a practice run or something?”

Slavanka nodded. “Yes, yes.”

“Okay, so… Chad is gonna walk out and run straight to the hottub. He may squeal a little bit along the way. He doesn’t like it when his toesiesget cold. His words, not mine. But anyway, he’ll jump in. And I’ll say, ‘MerryChristmas, babe.’ He’ll reach for my tits, but I’ll swat his hand away. Andthen I’ll say, ‘Sorry, babe. Ash still hasn’t lost her virginity, so my body isoff limits.’ And then he’ll probably call me a tease or something. And I’llreply, ‘Even though I can’t fuck you, I did still get you a gift.’ That’s your cue.”I pointed to Slavanka.

She kicked some snow behind her like a bull getting ready tocharge, and then she sprinted to the hot tub, grabbed Chad’s pretend head inboth hands like she was trying to crush a melon, yanked it backwards over theedge of the tub, and started kissing it. Or eating it? I wasn’t sure what washappening.

“Wow, okay,” I said. “I’m loving the energy. But should wemaybe try more of a slow, sexy walk? That felt pretty violent.”

“Violent and sexy same thing.”

“Sometimes, yes. But in this case, I think we really want tobuild the anticipation as you walk over. I want him to be thinking, ‘Holy shit,is Chastity really going to let me fuck this beautiful woman?’ ”

Slavanka just stared at me. She did not look convinced.

“How about this. Let me film it both ways, and then we candecide which way we like better.” I lifted my Santa hat and grabbed my phoneoff my head.

Slavanka walked back and got ready to pounce, but then a textcame through.

“Hold on,” I said. “Ash just texted.” I clicked on the text.

Ash: I think I just heard hooves on the roof!

Me: I’m outside and I don’t see anything.

Ash: Are you sure?

Me: Yes. But I’ll keep an eye out for him. Try to getsome sleep.

I switched back to my camera and motioned for Slavanka to doher practice run. She did, and it was just as violent as the first time.

“Okay, perfect. Now…” Another text interrupted me.

Ash: I can’t sleep. It’s too bright in here.

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