Page 116 of Out of the Storm

“I’m kind of embarrassed to admit this now, but I thought I’d try to tell him not to call you anymore. So, Mel took me out to Newton Falls.”

“O’Henry’s?”

“Right.”

“Fuck, Gare Bear, that was really—”

“—stupid?”

“Yeah.”

“I mean, I think I succeeded. Kind of. He said he’ll put your stuff out by the curb. I think that was his way of saying he wouldn’t call again.”

“But he punched you first?”

“No,” Gary said. “I, uhm, I pushed him.”

“Wait,youstarted the fight?”

“It wasn’t even a fight!” Gary lamented. “I pushed him, and then I fell backward, and then he stepped on my glasses. On purpose. Obviously.”

“What about your nose?”

“I was hit by a highball glass that fell off of a table.”

“Oh my God, Gare,” Jeff said, unable to hold back a snort-laugh. “Sorry. I feel terrible, but I can’t believe Bran wasn’t fucking with me when he said you beat the shit out of yourself.”

“I know. I can’t even fight correctly. What kind of boyfriend am I?”

“The best kind.” Jeff’s voice softened. “You stuck up for me.”

“Barely.”

“Hey, you said he wouldn’t call me again. So, I think that means you won. And you look really fucking cute right now. Hot, even.”

“Yes, my self-inflicted injuries must be so wildly attractive,” Gary joked with a small huff of a laugh.

Jeff’s lips twitched up in a tentative smile. “Yeah, they are,” he said, lifting the ice so that he could see Gary a little better. “Because when I look at them, I see you sticking up for me. I see you taking care of me. And that’s fucking hot, Gare.”

Gary smiled warmly. “All I ever wanted was to take care of you, Jeffrey.” His smile faltered a bit. It pulled at Jeff’s heart. “I wish we could work through thingstogether. I know you want to fix everything yourself, and if that’s really that important to you, I promise I won’t injure myself badly enough to make you come over again, but I... I really wish you’d let me take care of you too. I’ve never ever thought less of you, you know, whenever something... whenever you were scared or...” Gary’s voice cracked, and a couple of tears escaped his eyes. Jeff felt so fucking bad that Gary was crying again. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Jeff set the ice on the coffee table and held out his arms. “Let me hold you, Gare. You’ve held me plenty. I need to return the favor.”

While Gary moved to lie his head atop Jeff’s chest, he said, “I think you’re missing the point of what I was saying. I want to take care of you.”

“Letting me take care of youistaking care of me.”

“Okay, but...” Gary craned his head to catch Jeff’s eye. “Can’t you see that it’s the same for me?”

Jeff let out a long breath. Fuck. Gary was right. Again.

Gary nuzzled the side of his face against Jeff’s chest and said, “I missed you. I missedthis. I know it’s only been a few days, but I wasn’t sure when you’d ever let us hold each other again.”

“I missed you too.” Jeff squeezed him tighter and then leaned forward to pick up the ice again. He held it to Gary’s nose. “But, Gare, it’s hard for me to let you see me upset like that. All the back and forth—me okay with kissing and then suddenly not—that can’t be healthy for us either.”

“Why not?”

“Because I can see that it hurts you. Whenever we have to stop in the middle of something, I see how fucking sad you are.”

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