Page 103 of Resilience on Canvas

“Yup. Before the show, I noticed that they were looking for more people to join their theater company. Apparently, they had a few folks leave. Later, I found out it was because they weren’t paying so much, but it’swaybetter than eighty cents, I can tell you that!” Henry winced from the slight sting of Rose’s words, though he knew she wasn’t trying to be hurtful. Rose paused, hopping a few times and letting out a small shriek. Seeing her so excited eased the sting a bit. “Clara and I stuck around when the play was finished, and I asked if they’d ever want someone like me. I mean, I’ve been in afewplays, but mostly, I’m a singer, so I wasn’t sure if they’d really ever want me to join them. But they said they’dlovefor me to audition!”

Joe bent to kiss her cheek. “That’s spectacular, Rosie!”

“IknowI’ll make them love me. I just knowit!”

Henry’s smile broadened. “When’s yer audition?”

“Next week.”

“How much would they be payin’ you?”

“Fourteen bucks a week. Well, whenever I’m in a show. So, it’s notconsistentmoney, exactly, but it’s something. I mean, they have a few shows every year and they’ll pay me for the rehearsal time and the weeks when the shows are running. It’s notperfect, but—”

“Itisperfect, Rosie,” Joe said. “Especially because it’ll make you happy.”

Rose’s eyes filled with tears. “Thank you, sweetheart.”

While Rose chattered on about the kinds of productions this particular theater company had, Henry’s smile slowly fell. Even without looking over at Robert, Henry could feel both the man’s humiliation and his pain. He could imagine Robert saying something like “Goddamn son-of-a-bitch city! How come either of us can’t find no work yet?” And Henry wouldn’t have known what to say in return. Robert wanted so badly to take care of everyone. But life kept kicking him in the teeth. And now that Henry was with him, life seemed to be kicking Henry’s teeth in, too. First, Henry had lost that contest back in Alva. Now, neither of them had managed to find steady, well-paying work. The endless struggle was such a terrible thing, and Henry wasn’t sure how much longer they could go on like this.

At least they were struggling together, though. Henry would have rather been beaten by life so many times that he’d have to consume his meals through a straw than not be with Robert. Being Henry Davis was better than being Henry Sherwood, no matter what horrible luck he might have to endure.

While Henry was pretending to listen to Rose, Clara settled beside him and placed a hand on his back. When he turned to face her, she tilted her head, her eyebrows pinching as though she wanted to check if he was okay.

Henry managed a small smile and shrugged.

When Rose managed to rein in her excitement, she and Joe sat back on the floor, and then the men finished their chess match while Rose and Clara looked on. All the while, Robert kept on choosing his moves poorly, only he stopped cussing when Joe countered them. Henry’s heart hurt, each moment of silence from Robert like a knife to his chest. It turned out there wassomething worse than Robert outwardly complaining that he was losing while trying his best to fight for his little chess pieces. Quiet resignation. Seeing Robert’s fire snuffed out might have been the most horrible thing Henry had ever witnessed.

Later that night, once the men were finished playing, everyone left to ready themselves for bed, but as Henry started up the stairs to the bedrooms, Clara caught him by the wrist and silently motioned for him to follow her back to the main room. She pulled him in for a hug.

“How are you holdin’ up?” she whispered into his ear.

“Fine. Mostly. But Robert . . . he’s . . .”

She hugged him tighter. “I know.”

With a sigh, Henry pulled back and said, “It’s so hard to see him like this. Sometimes, he still has a little of that fire in him, and it’s comforting, in a way, because it means that he still wants to fight for what we want, but then, other times, Clara, he seems—”

“—broken.”

Henry nodded. “Gosh, you should have seen him when we were bein’ paid that first day. Eighty cents. I still can’t believe that’s what we make out there. Robert was beside himself. Neither of us has brought it up with each other since. I know he’s still upset. But it’s not the kind of upset I’ve even seen from him before. It’s softer, but... more terrifyin’.”

“I wish I knew what to say.”

“Ain’t nothin’tosay, maybe. But I’m sorry we’re stuck livin’ here with my parents for now.”

Clara began fiddling with her hair, twirling one of her locks. “Oh, I like it here.” She closed her eyes. “I’m sorry. Gosh, Henry, I feel horrible for sayin’ that.”

“Are you, uhm, tryin’ to tell me that you want to stay?”

“I couldn’t hurt Robert like that.”

“I know, but it sounds like you’d prefer it? If it wouldn’t hurt yer brother, I mean?”

“He’d feel so betrayed.” Clara met Henry’s eyes for a moment but then looked down at her feet. “I talked with yer parents. They love havin’ us here. Especially the kids. And they seem to love havin’ me here, too, I think. It’s real nice to have their help. Splittin’ the housework and childcare and such, it means I can focus on myself sometimes. Goodness, that sounds selfish.”

“No,” Henry said sincerely. “Not even a little. Clara, you’ve been stretchin’ yerself thin for so long. YouandRobert both have. You deserve to focus on yerself a little.”

Clara smiled wistfully. “In the mornings, yer mom has been watchin’ the kids while I explore the city for a while. I even went to the beach once. Sat right by the water and watched the waves. It was wonderful.” After a pause, her small smile vanished. “But it would crush Robert if we stayed here. He wants to make his own way.”

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