Page 79 of Tell Me Again
Grace’s question was quiet but the words echoed through his brain. He turned to find her leaning forward, elbows on the granite, her blue eyes intense and far too perceptive.
“I didn’t pick Bryce over Sam.” He still had trouble referring to Sam’s twin as Grace’s mom. A mom didn’t desert her newborn baby because she couldn’t handle the responsibility. As far as Trevor was concerned, Bryce didn’t deserve to be called Mom. “The three of us had always been friends. Sam was traveling the world for her modeling career, and Bryce and I still saw each other sometimes.”
“Your feelings for Sam were different.”
He dropped the wet rag into the sink and grabbed a paper towel. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“You were in love with her.”
He let out a choked laugh. “We were teenagers. I didn’t know what love was, and then she left. There wasn’t anything more than that.”
“You always say the most important thing is that I’m honest with you.” Her voice was suddenly so much older than her thirteen years. “It goes both ways, Dad.”
How could he be honest with his daughter when he wouldn’t allow himself to admit the truth? “It was a long time ago, Gracie. We all made choices. I don’t regret any of mine, because I have you.”
She straightened, traced her thumb over the shiny flecks of minerals in the granite. “You don’t go on dates.”
He moved closer, pitched his voice low. “That’s not going to change,” he told her, even though it was a promise he didn’t want to keep. “You’re my priority. Never forget that.”
She glanced at him from underneath her lashes and, for a moment, she looked like the baby girl she’d once been. He missed the simplicity of her younger years.
“I’m ok if you go out with Sam,” she whispered. “I mean, if you want to date her.”
“I... uh...”
The corner of her mouth kicked up. “You might want to work on your moves, Dad. You’re pretty rusty.”
“Rusty,” he repeated dumbly. “Yeah, probably. I don’t date, Grace.”
“Because of me.”
“Because I’ve made a choice not to.” He winked. “Mostly to save myself from the matchmaking mothers of your friends.”
“You’re a hot topic of conversation, that’s for sure.”
“I was joking. You mean the moms talk about me?”
“Sometimes.” She shrugged. “Let’s focus, Dad. If you want to date Sam, it’s fine.”
He didn’t bother to deny it. His daughter clearly understood him better than he’d guessed. “It didn’t sound fine when we talked about the wedding.”
Another shoulder shrug. “Just make sure if things don’t work out, you don’t mess up my chance to hang out with her.”
The same point Sam had made. “I would never do anything to hurt you, sweetheart. You know that.” His whole existence these past thirteen years had been centered around keeping her safe and happy. He moved to the other side of the counter and pulled her in for a hug. “Sam has become important to you,” he said into her hair.
“I wanted her to be my mom,” Grace whispered after a moment. The admission sliced across Trevor’s heart. “I’m the only person I know who never had a mom.”
“You had your nana and she loved you very much.”
Grace pulled back, her gaze shadowed with the pain of things he couldn’t change. “It’s not the same thing, Daddy.”
“I know, sweetheart.” He pulled her against him once more. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault, and it’s not Sam’s fault either. The fact that she wants to be a part of my life... it feels nice, you know? Normal.” She laughed. “Except when I search her on Google. Her life definitely hasn’t been normal.”
He thought of the things Sam had admitted to him about her past and the way she’d behaved when she was punishing herself for Bryce’s death. A few weeks ago he would have leveraged her reputation to warn his daughter away from her. Now things were different. He was different.
“Be careful about reading too much into the gossip online,” he warned. “I’m guessing not all of it was true and, even so, Sam isn’t the same person now.”
