Page 80 of Someone to Have
Taylor falls forward and I wrap my arms around her, holding tight until we’re both breathing normally again.
“That was nice,” she says, already sounding drowsy.
I cup her cheeks in my hands and kiss her mouth. “The understatement of the fucking century.”
“My dad always said to underpromise and overdeliver,” sheanswers with a grin that quickly turns into a yawn. “How am I so tired? It’s not even late.”
“Do you have panic attacks often?” I can imagine how much something like that would drain her energy.
“Not anymore.” She shakes her head, her long hair tickling my chest. “They happened regularly after my mom died. But I saw a therapist, learned some coping techniques, and slowly they went away. I think I felt…”
She moves off me, much to my disappointment, but snuggles in close, which I fucking love. “I felt lost without her. I’m the odd one out in my family. Mom was just as athletic and competitive as my dad and siblings, but she never made me feel like something was lacking in me because I wasn’t. Toby and Elise took up a lot of the air in the room. It’s easy to forget about the quiet kid.”
“It would be impossible to forget you.” I rub my hand in circles along the small of her back.
“The panic attack is done. You might be the confidence coach, but I’m pretty sure neither of us wants to talk more about my feelings.”
Her words shouldn’t bother me, but they do. I shouldn’t want to deny them, but the truth is I want to hear all about her feelings, especially if they’re anywhere near the level of mine. I don’t say that, of course. Instead, I press a kiss to her temple.
“That’s right, because you’re using me for my body,” I murmur. I feel her start to pull away, so I loop an arm more tightly around her waist. “Or at least what my body can do for you.”
She laughs softly. “I don’t think there’s a woman out there who would blame me. But I truly didn’t mean?—”
“Don’t say the word again,” I command. “It’s okay. We both know what this is.”
Who am I to demand more from her when I could stay if I wanted to, but I’m still not planning on it?
I could retire. I’ve got plenty of money saved up, and I likeworking for Marty. But I’m returning to my own life because it’s what I know. And what I know has kept me safe for a long time.
She tries—and fails—to stifle another yawn.
“Go to sleep, Tinkerbell.” I pull her against my body like we’re two crescent moons. “I’ve got you.”
And for now, I do.
25
ERIC
Eventually,I extricate myself from Taylor and climb out of bed, careful not to wake her. I put on my clothes, place the dinner that’s gone cold in her refrigerator, and lock the door on my way out.
The snow is falling in big fluffy flakes, and Rhett and his friend are certain they’re going to get a snow day.
“We’ll sled Widener Hill if it dumps,” Mike says through the tinny microphone on the computer in Rhett’s bedroom. “My mom can drive.”
I hear him and call out, “My truck has new snow tires. I’ll drive.”
I expect Rhett to glare at me for inserting myself into his plans like I’m an actual parent. Instead, he turns and gives me a shit-eating grin. “Can we pick up wings and have Mike here for lunch after?”
He wants his friend to hang out at our house. Holy shit. I nod and try to look cool. “Sure. But Coach Toby’s going to want everyone to watch film at some point. There’s no practice if school iscanceled.”
“We’ll watch for hours,” Mike calls through the computer, and I laugh.
“I’ll hold you both to that. I’m turning in, Rhett. Off the computer and in bed by midnight, snow day or not.”
“I gotta be off, too,” Mike says.
“Okay,” Rhett agrees.
