Page 65 of Glass Jawed
She stares at the woman on my bed, and it’s not hatred I see. It’s... sadness. Quiet. Intimate. Like she’s mourning something only she understands. Not disgust. Not fury. Just a deep, hollow ache in her eyes that makes my chest cave in.
She doesn’t flinch when I speak. Doesn’t argue. Doesn’t spit out something to protect herself. When I finally manage to push the words out—she just nods.
“I understand,” she says, her voice unnaturally calm.
I’m still hoping she’ll say more. Maybe finally yell. But then she turns and walks away. No screaming. No closing argument.No dramatic exit. Just silence and slippers shuffling against the floor.
Somehow, that’sworse.
That’s not fury.
That’sresignation.
That’s her giving up.
On me. Onus.
And that? That wasn’t the reaction of the nameless woman who lied her way into my life.
That was Rohi.
My Rohi.
The woman who quietly tears up but never cries. Who calls her best friend twice a day just to check in. Who remembered the date I quit smoking when I didn’t.
The same woman who forgave me before I even apologized—because she understood what pain looks like. Fuck. Did I actually ever apologize? Sincerely?
And what thefuckdid I just do?
The silence in the apartment is shattered by a voice that slices through my thoughts.
“What the fuck wasthat?” Chrissy—yeah, definitely Chrissy—grabs her bra from the nightstand and shoots me a look like I’ve kicked her dog.
“Was this some kind of performance art? Did you just use me for a revenge porn stunt?”
I don’t answer. I physically can’t. My mouth is dry. My body feels numb.
“You said you weresingle!” she snaps. “You didn’t mention a girlfriend—let alone a fucking walk-in ambush! Jesus.”
Her voice keeps rising, but it’s all static to me. Background noise. A screeching radio I can’t turn off. I watch her get dressed in a blur of limbs and fabric—and all I can think is:
Rohi saw her naked. Saw me naked with someone else. Someone who wasn’t her.
Even if nothing happened. Even if I couldn’t get it up. I invited this chaos. Ikissedthis woman.
And for what—
The door slams behind Chrissy before the echo even dies and I flinch.
Another memory slams into me.
Thatnight.
Rohi didn’t yell then either. Didn’t scream like this woman just did. Didn’t throw anything.
She just stood there. Still. Quiet. Her head tilted slightly downward, like she was trying to shrink herself. I thought she was calm. Thought she wasunaffected.
But now I know better.
