Page 122 of Durango

I close my eyes, and when I open them, daylight is streaming through the window. I reach over, but Willow isn’t there. And the bed is cold. I jump up and search for her. She’s lying down on the couch.

“Willow?”

She moans as she slowly wakes. “What time is it?”

“Six in the morning. How long have you been out here?”

She rubs her eyes as she sits up. “A few hours. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

On the floor next to the couch is a pad of paper. I pick it up and scan it. “What’s this?” I ask as I sit down next to her.

She hugs her knees. “It’s a list of things I need to do so I’m prepared in case we are ever in danger again.”

Her words are a gut punch. I toss the list onto the table and then lean over, burying my face in my hands. “I’m so sorry. I’m supposed to be protecting you, and clearly, you don’t feel safe.”

“What do you mean, you are supposed to be protecting me? We should protect each other.”

And a second punch. “Willow, protecting people is what I do. Of course I’m supposed to keep you safe.” I sit on the couch next to her and take her hand. “Look, I’m happy that you want to be prepared and you are learning self-defense. Tyler is gone. No one else is coming after you. You are safe now.”

“Durango, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me,” she says.

Appreciate? Why does this sound like a breakup speech? I hold my breath for her next words.

“But I need to learn to feel safe on my own.”

Ah, shit. Why would she end things? This doesn’t make sense. “So, you’re breaking up?”

She frowns. “What? No, how did you jump to that?”

I shrug. “Because I put you in harm’s way yesterday.”

She climbs onto my lap. “Durango, this isn’t about that. Last night, I woke up having a panic attack. Something that’s happened several times since I escaped from Tyler. That’s why I came out here and made this list. I need to do these things to help myself. I know you’ll keep me safe. But I can’t keep living my life scared. That’s what I’ve been doing for the past six years. I must learn a different way. And that will include making lists, taking more martial arts classes, and maybe buying another lock for my door.”

“Move in here,” I say without thinking.

Her eyes widen. “What?”

I pause for a moment, but no, I don’t feel any hesitation. “Move in here with me.”

She smiles. “Uh, shouldn’t we date for a while before we take the next step?”

I shrug. “It’s inevitable you’ll move in here, so why wait?”

“Inevitable?”

I kiss her forehead. “Yep.”

Several emotions cross her face as she stares at me, thinking it over. “I really appreciate the offer, but Durango, I don’t want to move in because you’re trying to help me feel safe. When we move in together, I want it to be because we are in love and ready to take that next step. Let’s not rush things.”

Sweat breaks out on the back of my neck. I didn’t want to say anything this early, but I can’tnotsay anything now. “Willow, I do love you, and I want to be around you every moment I can. That’s why I want you to move in with me.”

She leans back, taking me in. She opens her mouth a couple of times, but nothing comes out.

“Hey,” I say. “I didn’t say that to put any pressure on you. I just want you to know where I stand.”

Her lips curl up. “Durango, I love you, too. I thought it was too soon, so I haven’t said anything, but I don’t want to hold back any longer.”

“Too soon? Hell, woman, we’ve known each other more than half our lives at this point.”

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