Page 108 of Up in Smoke

I roll her to the side and let go, which earns me a whine and a scowl. After tossing the condom and cleaning myself up, I return to the bed. The second I’m on my back and under the bedding, Mesa climbs over to sprawl right on top of me. I like the familiar feeling of her perched on me like this, and I chuckle when she does her usual shoulder shimmy to burrow down and get comfortable.

“You’re stuck with me now,” she whispers, cheek flat over my heart, just before my eyes close.

Does she really not know? The damage was done ages ago. I could trace back and pinpoint the exact moment I knew, if I really wanted to. But it doesn’t matter. Before we even moved past friends, I was painfully aware I’d never cared about anyone as much as I do her.

Not even close.

My eyes feel too wet. I blink rapidly several times and then lift my arm to rub my thumb and forefinger over them.

“Well, shit,” I joke, lowering my arm to wrap tightly around her back again. “Damn pest, you are.”

Her chest vibrates against mine with a small laugh followed by a massive yawn. My entire body stills when she momentarily lifts her head to kiss me, then lies back down with a contented sigh. If I move, my eyes might fly open, and I’ll wake up to find out this was all a dream.

I focus on her gentle curves beneath my palm. Her hair tickling my chest. The warmth in my veins every time she breathes against my skin. It all feels real.

The rest of the world disappears around us, and all I’m left with is the realization that I’m not longing for this anymore. It’s all mine.She’sall mine. My arms lock around her in a more secure hold. It’s real.

“Good night.” Her whisper is so light, I almost don’t hear it.

My throat clears, and I gently sweep my palm up and down her back. “Good night, Mace.”

36

MESA

“But we’re onlyin the second week of July!” Savannah says with a gasp and excited eyes.

I rise to my tiptoes, hoping the stepstool that I’m standing on doesn’t topple over. Stretching my arm as far as it’ll go, my fingers finally wrap around the delicate wine glass stem, and I carefully pull it down from the top of the kitchen cabinet. I have no idea why my nana stored it up here. It’s nearly impossible to reach.

Wine glass in hand, I turn to look at my friend over my shoulder. “I know. We turned it in early.”

Savannah claps and squeals in her seat at the little round kitchen table. I laugh, knowing I had the same giddy reaction when I sent the last files at around eleven last night.

“I can’t even say I’m surprised,” she admits. “You worked so dang hard on that app update. Can you think of anything better than spending the rest of the summer with that project off your shoulders?”

I can, actually.

After stepping down, I pad barefoot through the kitchen and place the glass in the sink. It’s covered in a thick layer of dust.Savannah is surrounded by a mess of cut stems, petals, and one milky jade-colored vase. I sink into the chair next to her and pick up a stem to fluff out its purple bloom.

“No work for a little while is great and all,” I say. “But even if I hadn’t busted my ass to get it done with time to spare, I was still going to spend the rest of the summer with you and everyone else I love. That’s all I want.”

“Everyone else youlove?” She quirks an eyebrow.

I wave off her comment. “You know what I mean.”

She smiles at the bundle of baby’s breath in her hands before setting it down and pushing away from the table. “Hold that thought. I’ll be right back.”

Savannah spins toward the front door while I hum a made-up tune and arrange a bundle of flowers on the table in front of me.

In my dreams, this summer was supposed to be about redirection. I envisioned a stretch of slow months in which I cleansed my existence of demanding workloads and romantic fantasies. What I ended up with turned out to be the opposite.

Some days, I was glued to my laptop from the moment I woke up to the moment I drifted to sleep. Others, I was falling for a man who yearned so shamelessly for me that I couldn’t help but give up my defenses against love.

I’m glad for it, though. I still ended up exactly where I wanted to be, even if the path to get here was chock-full of everything I swore would be the end of me. It’s not always about what you’re doing or how you do it that shapes your life, I guess. It’s your people. Who you surround yourself with. That’s the key.

Savannah flurries back inside a moment later. I eye the small velvet box in her hand. When I put down the flowers and turn toward her, she opens the lid and sets it in front of me.

“We were waiting to plan a celebration once you finished your app and give it to you then. But—now seems right. I helpedwith the design, and B made all the arrangements to have it made. She’s going to be so mad when she finds out I gave it to you while she was at work,” she adds with a laugh.