Page 56 of Carnival
Rose
“Rose, calm down,’’ Aria urges, trying to grab my hand and pull me to sit. I snatch my hand back, still pacing through her bedroom, my feet silent on the wooden floor. My mind’s been racing with too many questions, but most importantly, I cannot stop thinking about James.
“Stop telling me to calm down,’’ I snap, then immediately regret it. I take a deep breath and come to a stop in front of her bed, then take a seat on the edge, burying my face in my hands. “I’m sorry,’’ I mumble through my hands, the sound coming out muffled.
“It’s alright,’’ she sighs. “You’re stressed, you’re scared, I get it. Do you have any ideas how we can proceed?”
I lift my head from my hands, staring blankly at her. Her expression is a mix of worry and annoyance, not at me, but at this entire situation, and I can’t help but share the sentiment. It’s been a rough forty-eight hours, and I don’t know how muchlonger I’ll be able to hold onto the hope that Hudson might succeed in doing anything.
The biggest issue is that we know nothing about Vivian Hunt.
Without knowing anything, Hudson can’t just use his connections or bribery to get James out. We don’t know how deep her influence is or who’s on her side and payroll, and until we do, we have to stay put, and that’s killing me.
A soft knock comes to the bedroom door, and a few seconds later, Blair pokes her head through, carrying a big mug of steaming tea. She hands me the mug, and I inhale, the soothing scent of chamomile allowing me to rest for a moment.
“Thanks.’’
“Don’t mention it,’’ she smiles softly, then sits next to me. “How are you holding on?”
“Terribly,’’ I admit, blowing into the mug to cool the tea faster, then taking a sip of it, enjoying the warmth that fills my mouth.
“Hudson and Noelle are still trying to figure out a way to see James. As of right now, he’s been admitted to prison, and no one can get to him yet.’’
“What about Arlo?”
Blair blinks. “What about him?”
“He massacred an entire prison to set you free; surely, he can do it again, right?”
She winces. “Sweetheart, that’s not the solution here. Sure, he can do that, but what happens after? He had pure luck the first time; I doubt it’ll repeat. I know you want to see James again, and I promise you, we’ll do everything in our powerto make that happen, but we can’t put Hudson and Noelle in danger or risk exposing their business. That’ll just cause all of us to share a cell with James.’’
I finish the tea and set the mug aside. I don’t want to admit it — but she is right. I’m not that selfish to ask them to risk everything for James, so that’s not an option. With a deep breath, I crawl onto Aria’s bed, hugging one pillow.
It takes them a moment, but both of them climb to lay next to me, one on each side, then hug me tightly. My body trembles, and silent tears stream down my cheeks. Blair’s softly stroking my hair, whilst Aria tightens her grip on me from behind. Neither of them speaks, but they don’t need to.
Their support is the only thing that’s getting me through this mess.
The truth is, I’m scared.
I’m scared of what will happen to James, and I’m scared that these people will come for me. I’m scared that without James in the picture, they will kill me without a second thought. I don’t want to die. I didn’t do anything in life; I didn’t get to live.
I’m only fucking twenty.
“It’ll be okay,’’ Aria murmurs. “We’re right behind you, okay? You’ll pull through this. I won’t let you drown.’’
A small sob slips from me, and the girls only hug me tighter. I let it all out — all the stress, frustrations, and fears — and let them hold me. I hate how weak this all makes me seem, but I don’t have the strength to put on a brave face and act as if nothing had happened.
Slowly, I sit up, wiping my tears with the back of my sleeve, taking in a deep, shaky breath. The two sit up right after me, still worried. I offer a small smile, but it doesn’t quite reach my eyes.
“I should really schedule a session with my therapist.’’
Aria snorts. “You can say that twice.’’
Blair puts her hand on my shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. “I know it’s hard, and I know you’re feeling lost. I’ve been there, trust me. But you need to focus on figuring out what steps you want to take next. You can cry later.’’
I give her a firm nod, then stand up, walking over to the window and looking out at the scenery. It started raining last night, the last pieces of fall. It will start snowing soon, and the cold weather slowly started creeping up my bones.
“I need to see James.’’ I turn to look at them. “I don’t care how, I don’t care who gets me in, or what it takes, but I need to see him sooner rather than later.’’
