Page 149 of Pistols and Plush Toys

“I’ll have the same,” Meredith said, “San Pellegrino, thank you.”

The waiter headed off, but Nikolai turned his attention to Meredith. “No wine today?”

“Not really in the mood,” Meredith said.

“Thanks for inviting me,” Xander was saying to Elliot. “Living at home has been…notmy favorite.”

“Living at home?” Gerard asked, sounding curious. Nikolai guessed the topic hadn’t come up in their talk about concerts.

Xander still blew out a heavy breath. “Yeah. Unfortunately. Stuff kinda went real badly with my ex. So now I’m stuck back in my parents house while I build myself back up.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that,” Meredith said.

“A bad ex?” Gerard asked, sitting up at attention now. No doubt thinking of Elliot’s ex, the way Nikolai had. “Are you okay?”

“I mean, not likethat bad.” Xander’s eyes flicked to Elliot before focusing back on Gerard. “There was just some light identity theft and him maxing out a bunch of credit cards in my name and ruining my credit for the next decade.”

“He didwhatnow?” Gerard asked, displeasure all over his face.

“It’s fine now,” Xander said, flapping a hand. “In the past. Totally behind me, except I’m just, you know, working on fixing his mess now. But once I’m done paying off the debt, I can start taking steps to finally move out again. Just, uh, until then, things kind of suck a little bit.” Xander shook his head. “But anyway! That’s a big downer and I’m fundamentally against being a bigdowner. That’s why I was asking Elliot earlier if I could borrow his boyfriend.”

“Because you want your ex dealt with?” Gerard asked carefully, glancing at Nikolai. Almost as if asking permission.

“What?” Xander blinked, obviously taken aback, before he snickered at Gerard’sjoke.“No, of course not. Because Nikolai isn’t ajerk,and it would be nice to have someone actually take me out on a date that wasn’t secretly on my own dime. Not that I don’t believe in also doing the paying, obviously, but I’d like to know upfront whether or not I’d be the one footing the bill, you know?” He grinned. “Also there’s a lot to be said for dating mature men. Right Elliot?”

Elliot’s ears turned red and he suddenly became very interested in his menu, even though Nikolai knew for a fact that he’d already long picked out his food. “R-right.”

“Wait a second, dealt with how?” Xander asked, brow furrowing. He focused his attention on Nikolai. “Do you, like, make people swim with the fishes?”

“Oh, u-um…” Elliot also looked to Nikolai, eyes wide.

Nikolai frowned. He’d heard that expression before, but couldn’t recall now what it was supposed to mean. English idioms were difficult. “Is not my business how people swim.”

Across the table, Gerard snorted and Meredith laughed.

“He’s asking if you’re in the Mafia,”Gerard supplied in Russian.

Xander’s attention snapped to Gerard, leaning toward him with wide, excited eyes. “Oh! Okay, wow, hey, say more words. Please?”

Gerard looked startled for only a second, then grinned. “?????? ????.”

That got a huff of a laugh out of Nikolai.

“What’d you say?” Xander asked eagerly.

“He’s say ‘more words’,” Nikolai translated.

Xander laughed and Gerard’s smile got wider. “Sorry, couldn’t help myself.”

“No, no,” Xander dropped his chin into his hands. “It’s very important to me to hear you keep talking in whatever language you just spoke. Is it Russian? It sounds like Russian. That's so cool! I had no idea you spoke another language.”

“Yeah, Russian,” Gerard said. “Learned since my best friend was fresh off the boat and shit at English.

“I’m better at English than you are at Russian,”Nikolai said in Russian.

“You have the same amount of brain as a potato,”Gerard shot back.

“So cool,” Xander said, looking between the two of them. “I always wanted to learn a second language. I had a violin teacher who was Russian. The language has such a pretty sound.”

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