Page 41 of You're So Vine
“I’m right here,” says Cam pointedly.
He is ignored. Jackson begins to count on his fingers. “There was the yoga teacher from Martinburg, the primary school teacher from Santa Rosa, that woman who briefly owned the chocolate shop, Javier’s wife’s sister’s second cousin, a European acquaintance of Ted’s who may have been a princess…”
Jackson’s onto his other hand now.
“… that financier from New York who bought the old manor and burned it down for the insurance, the rep from the organic food certifying company…”
The Durant boys have contributed nothing to this conversation. Mainly because they’ve been killing themselves laughing.
“Oh, man,” says Danny, wiping his eyes. “I want to know more about the arsonist. That sounds like a reallyhot date.”
Max snorts. “Why didn’t the princess work out? I mean, if the shoe fits?”
“That’s Cinderella, you doofus,” says Izzy. “She was upper middle-class at best.”
“Walt Disney and every pre-teen girl would beg to disagree,” Max retorts.
“I think Cam was wise to break up with the chocolate shop owner,” says Nate. “I wouldn’t have a bar of a woman like that.”
“Not to mention his close brush with the crazy artist,” says Jackson. “And that organics rep was certifiable.”
Danny high-fives him.
I sneak a look at Cam, who is leaning back in his chair staring up at the ceiling, wishing, I imagine, that it would fall on top of him and end this torture.
Shelby puts down the salt and pepper, and frowns. “How come I didn’t know about any of these other women? Why is this all news to me?”
“You were busy with Dad,” says Jackson. “Learning all that wine stuff.”
“Wine stuff?” Shelby gives her brother a look.
He shrugs. “That’s why you’re running the place and not me.”
Shelby pulls out her chair and flops into it.
“Eat!” she says, waving her hands at the food. “I didn’t cook it, so it’ll be fine!”
“Ted?” I ask.
The whipped potatoes are topped with truffle shavings. Dead giveaway that the food came from Bartons hotel. Requesting that they hold the truffle is like asking for your steak well done: you get put on the Bartons blacklist.
“Yes, Ted had it sent around,” Shelby says. “I just had to keep it warm.”
“As the New York financier said in court about the old manor,” says Danny, causing the shoulders of four out of the five men at the table to shake yet again.
“It’s delicious,” says Izzy loudly. “Why don’t we all enjoy our delicious food in peace?”
“Thank you, Izzy,” says Shelby. “It’s a good thing Frankie and Tyler had to fly home today. If all the Armstrong kids were here, it’d be like that hollerin’ contest they have in North Carolina.”
“But you’ve got me,” says Jackson. “For a few days more, anyway.”
“You’re not staying with Nate and Shelby, are you?” I ask. After their wedding? Talk about a third wheel.
Jackson looks down at his plate. “Nah, I found a place.”
“Room for two?” says Danny. “I hear there’s a yoga teacher looking for a place to hang her mat.”
He, Nate, and Max are in fits again. Someone’s going to snort whipped potato out of his nose if he’s not careful.
