Page 14 of Never Have I Ever
“Are you serious?” I ask her in disbelief.
She nods.
“This is what you need help with?”
She nods again.
I smile, she’s so nervous she can’t even speak. “I think I’m going to need more of an explanation than a nod, angel.”
Shit. The nickname just slipped out of my mouth. Her eyes widen at the term, but then her eyes soften as she smiles. Thank fuck it didn’t freak her out.
She stands straight and licks her lips. “I want you to take my virginity,” she admits. She sounds confident, more so than before, but I can see her throat bobbing as she swallows nervously.
I start to laugh. I don’t mean to, but I choke out a laugh, she frowns a little, so I clear my throat, steadying myself. “You’re serious?” I ask her.
She nods, clamming up again.
“That isn’t much of an explanation,” I say, raising my eyebrow at her. She can't be serious. Is this a joke?
“I said I needed your help,” she says.
I smirk. “That’s a little different than taking your virginity. I’m going to need a little more from you. What exactly do you need help with?” From her list, it’s pretty obvious, but I like to see her squirm.
Which she does. She shifts on her feet as she fidgets with her hands. Color reaches her face once again. I like seeing her blush, nervous, and shy around me. Most people assume they’re better than me and look the other way.
“Everything,” she admits.
“That’s a big spectrum.”
She nods and looks towards my hands. I’ve still got her note filled with a dirty to-do list, and I can’t help but wonder why she asked me. Does she know who I am around here? If she did, she wouldn’t want to be around me, let alone ask me to help her with this list.
“Why do you want to do this?” I ask her. “It’s okay to not do everything in a Never Have I Ever game. It doesn’t make you less of a person because you’re not… active.”
Her eyes meet mine, and her brows furrow; a line forms between her soft eyebrows. Shit, I didn’t mean to upset her. I just wanted her to know, if anyone pressured her into thinking she had to do any of these things, that she doesn’t have to if she doesn’t want to.
“I want to be like you,” she says.
My eyebrows raise. I step back in shock, wondering why the hell she would say that. “No one wants to be like me.”
“I do.”
I’m confused. I’m so confused about why this girl thinks she needs my help, why she says she wants to be like me. She’s pure and sweet, and I’m everything but that. I’m tainted, corrupted, and I ruin everything I come into contact with. She’d be right to run the other way and never speak to me again.
“Why?” I ask her.
“Because,” she says, taking a step closer. “You have lived.”
I’m only more confused by that statement. I have lived? She thinks being me is living?
“What do you want from me?” I ask her because this is a completely different explanation for why she’s here. The list feels like just the tipping point for what she really wants.
She sighs. “I want to see the world like you do. I want to go crazy and forget about rules for once in my life,” she breathes out, blinking at me before continuing. “And I want you to teach me how to do that. I want you to teach me everything. How to not care, how to have fun and…” She tucks her hair behind her hair before her eyes meet mine. “I want you to teach me about sex. All of it.”
“Do they not have sex education wherever you come from?” I joke. She can’t possibly be serious. She wants me to corrupt her, to make her everything she’s not, when that’s the first thing I noticed about her. How honest and pure and kind she is. Not a chance.
She blinks slowly, her eyes locked on mine. “I want to learn from you,” she husks out.
Aw hell. This is the worst form of temptation. I can't do this. It would be like I was taking advantage of her, and it wouldn't feel right. The only reason she’s asking me is because she has heard the rumors, and she thinks I’m the complete opposite of what she is, good and happy.
