Page 108 of Would You Rather
“What was it like dating a celebrity?”
“Did you sleep with him?”
The questions just keep coming at me, one after another, and I can't seem to dodge them fast enough. I'm surrounded by a bunch of people, all eager for answers that I don't have.
I knew I should have stayed home today. Gabi warned me not to leave, but after I got the worst email of my life, there was no way I could just stay at home wallowing.
Just a few days ago, I was so happy. My parents, who I only talked to every few weeks, went from calling me every few days. I was so excited about the audition I had been waiting my entire life to get. I had a great day with my amazing friends, and I was about to meet up with my boyfriends.
Life was going so well, but I should have known it was too good to be true.
Because it all came tumbling down in a matter of hours.
After mine and Lucas’ prior fake relationship was publicly exposed, I’ve been made out to be a fame whore, sleeping withLucas for money and fame when that’s the furthest thing from the truth.
My parents were distraught over the fact that I lied to them once again after trying to build the trust between us and my promising I’d tell them the truth.
The happiness I'd been feeling suddenly vanished when I saw the hurt in my parents’ eyes. I let them down by breaking the promise I made to be truthful after we've been working so hard to rebuild our trust.
And on top of everything, I lost the audition
We regret to inform you that you were not selected for the role in our production. In light of recent negative press surrounding your public image, we believe it’s best for the project's image to explore other options.
Another rejection.
A single paragraph.
After years and years of auditions that led nowhere, I finally thought I had a shot, and now it’s out of my reach, and I have to start over once again.
“Is it true you hate each other?” Another question that makes my heart drop into the pit of my stomach.
“Okay, that’s enough.” I lift my head, seeing Connor push through the crowd as he heads toward me. His hand wraps around my wrist, and I suck in a breath when he pulls me away from the crowd. I forgot how it feels to have someone other than Lucas touch me. He drops his hand, and I rub at the skin, an unsettling feeling washing over me.
He shoots me a smile when we’re away from everyone else, and it does absolutely nothing for me. It wasn’t long ago that the mere idea of going out with him had me nervous, stumblingover my words. I had made a promise to myself not to get involved with another guy again, and I had kept it.
Until Lucas. That promise was crumbling piece by piece the minute the elevator doors shut. I just didn’t know at the time that it would lead to all of this. He was everything I never knew I wanted, and I fell head-first in love with him when I was trying my hardest not to. But I didn’t want to fight it. I just wanted him.
“Are you okay?” Connor asks, his eyes softening.
I haven’t talked to Connor in a long time. He’s been keeping his distance ever since Lucas claimed me as his at the frat party, and honestly, even back then, I was already losing interest in Connor. It was always Lucas. It still is.
“I’m okay,” I assure him, returning his smile. “Thank you.”
“People can be dicks,” he says, brushing his hair back. My eyes follow the movement, and it reminds me of when Lucas does it whenever he’s nervous. A pang of guilt hits my stomach, making me look to the side.
I’ve been avoiding him.
After I opened the article, I left and went home. Gabi knew something was wrong, but I didn’t tell her, I didn’t tell anyone. I just shut myself in my room, avoiding every one of his texts, every call, every knock on the door when he came over last night.
I just needed time. Time to figure this all out. Time to process that my dreams have crashed and burned.
“I’m sorry about what’s happening,” he says, his eyes narrowing. “But now you don’t have to lie anymore.” My brows furrow, and I wonder if the only reason why he’s here, talking to me, is because he also thinks that the relationship is fake and thinks he has a shot.
“Connor,” I start, shaking my head. He’s a nice guy, but he’s not at all who I want. He doesn’t make me feel safe or taken care of. He doesn’t make my heart race whenever he looks at me. He doesn’t give me goosebumps when he touches me. He’s not Lucas.
“Fuck.” He drops his head, letting out a sigh. “You’re about to turn me down, aren’t you?”
I shoot him an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry.”
