Page 81 of Crazy Pucking Love
I nodded so we could be done with the conversation that was digging at my insides, making everything feel wrong, but all I could think was that when it came to being careful where Dane Kowalski was concerned…
Well, it was way too late for that.
Chapter Forty-Two
Dane
Right now I was cursing myself for letting Ryder drag me to the Quad tonight. According to him, I “owed him” after failing as a wingman last time. But I wasn’t in the party mood, huge hockey victory notwithstanding.
I wanted to be with Megan, off somewhere in the city discovering new places, or at the diner, or in my bedroom—I’d taken any place as long as she was there with me. Suddenly I wanted that boyfriend label I’d balked at. I told myself I was going to be a better person and not disappoint people, but I seemed to be failing on all levels. Selfish or not, I wanted Megan all to myself, for as long as I could have her.
I just didn’t think she’d still want me after her brother told her about every shitty thing I’d done and understandably convinced her to stay away.
Misty approached, breaking into my daydreams about Megan. “You wanna dance?”
“No thanks.”
She stuck out her lips. “You’re a hard egg to crack, Dane Kowalski.”
“So go crack another egg. I’m not sure what you see in me anyway.”
“I’m not a girl who needs to see something in you. I see the muscles, the strong hands…” She ran her fingernails down my forearm and traced down my index finger. “And I want them on me. Just one night of fun. What do you have to lose?”
“A lot,” I said, worry rising up that I’d already lost it.
“Fine,” she huffed. “You’re no fun.”
Relief filled me when she finally walked away.
My phone rang, and I frowned at the screen. Not that I didn’t want to talk to my sister, but two calls in one night?
“Cassidy?” I plugged the other ear and strained to hear her above the crowd.
“I didn’t know whether to call or not, but I thought you’d want to know.”
A rock formed in my gut. “Is it Lissa? Did she get into trouble?” Grounded or not, there was only so much Cassidy could do if Mom and Dad weren’t home to help enforce the punishment.
“It’s not Lissa. It’s Jazmine. She almost killed herself tonight.”
Everything in me turned to stone.
“Sorry, that sounded purposeful, like she meant to,” Cassidy said. “And who knows, maybe that’s what she was going for. It certainly seems like she has a death wish lately.”
I traveled as far away from the speakers as I could and double-checked the volume was all the way up on my phone. “Cassidy, what happened?”
“Way too much alcohol and way too much something else. They couldn’t get her heart beating, and luckily before the people partying with her ran, someone called 911. She’s in the hospital right now.”
Everything in the Quad sounded muted, like I’d been shoved underwater. My lungs expanded, not gaining any oxygen, adding to the suffocating sensation.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you,” Cassidy said. “I just thought… Are you mad?”
“Not mad. I’m…” I didn’t know how to finish it, so I didn’t bother. Closing my eyes, I saw the girl who used to sit next to me on the step and share a soda after school. After our last conversation there, I thought an inkling of our old friendship had risen up through the crap. That maybe eventually we could be a different version of okay. “I’ll talk to you later, Cassidy.”
I hung up and, on autopilot, walked through the room, weaving around bodies.
I spotted Ryder playing flip cup and headed over to tell him I was out. I needed air. Or…something. I couldn’t be in here anymore.
But before I could tell him I was leaving, he gestured to the spot next to him. “Perfect timing. We’re a man short.”
