Page 144 of Between Regrets and Promises

“Do you want me to make you something to eat first?” I ask, wrapping a towel around my waist.

“I’m not hungry,” she replies as she brushes her hair. “Thank you, though.”

“Okay.”

I wait until she’s finished, then open the door. Grabbing her hand, I pull her closer and kiss her forehead. “I’m here, Soph,” I remind her. “Let me be here for you.”

Her chest deflates as she nods.

Cupping her face, I press my lips to hers, but she stills. My heart sinks, knowing my sweet Sophie is pulling away.

“I’m sorry,” she says softly.

“For what?” I don’t like the look on her face. In fact, it scares the shit out of me to see her like this.

“I feel like I’m toxic to you. To all of you. I’ve caused so much pain, and the last thing I want to do is cause more for you…” She bows her head.

“Soph, what’re you talking about? You’re not toxic to anyone,” I reassure her, tilting her chin up. “I love you.”

She blinks up at me. “I know you do, and that’s why I can’t jump back into our life the way it was before. Things aren’t the same. We can’t just continue where it left off.”

I inhale a sharp breath and swallow down my heart that’s lodged in my throat. “We’re stronger together, Sophie.” I grab her hand and cup my palms around it. “We can take things slow, but you don’t have to go through this alone. If anything, my past and history makemetoxic to you, but you’re the reason I’ve seen life in a whole new light for the first time in years. I want to do better,bebetter for you.”

The way she looks at me, I can tell she’s holding back her tears. “And you’re an amazing man, Mason. It’s why I love you so much. But I need you to understand where I’m coming from. I can’t live life pretending nothing ever happened, and that he didn’t touch and hurt me, because what happened has forever changed me. I need to figure out a way to get through it so I can move forward. I want to move forward with you.” Her bottom lip trembles. This isn’t easy for her to say, but it definitely isn’t easy to hear either.

I choke back, not wanting this to be any harder for her. “Tell me what I can do, Soph. Please.” I’m close to pleading on my knees, not wanting to lose her. She’s the only reason I look forward to waking up in the mornings. I rest my head against hers, our breaths mingling together. “I don’t want to lose you. I can’t.”

“I need some time. Figure out my own emotions and clear my head so I can be what you deserve,” she states, her words like cement. “I want us to be together, but I feel so broken right now.”

“I’ll do whatever you need, but I’m not going anywhere, okay? I’ll always be here, and I want to help you through this. So please let me do that at least?”

She nods in agreement. “I’ve got an appointment with my new therapist, Mary, so I can work through everything conflicting in my head. Between Weston and Dalton, I need to process it correctly. I didn’t after the first incident, and I’m afraid I’ll spiral downward if I push it aside again.”

I know she’s right. Deep down, she does need to work through it all, but I wish she wasn’t pushing me away in the process.

“You do what you have to do, sweetheart. I’m here to support you in any way I can, and I’m not going anywhere. You’re all I need.” I press a soft kiss on her cheek, committing to memory the way she feels against me.

I’m prepared for the fight of my life to keep her, no matter the cost.

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

SOPHIE

I missMason’s touch more than anything. His scent, his kisses, the way he holds me close. His T-shirt is something I can’t let go of either. When the tears threaten to come, I close my eyes and inhale a deep breath. Then I bury my face in his shirt and let them fall.

None of this was supposed to happen. Mason and I were finally on the same page, getting ready to begin our relationship, and then it imploded around us. The strength I hid behind and emotions I pushed down after Weston’s death blew up in my face the moment Dalton captured me.

I’d never been so scared in my entire life. Knowing the guys would come for me, I prayed for a miracle that somehow no one would get shot. My worst fear was that someone would die trying to save me, and I’m thankful every day that didn’t happen.

I’m the fool who let Dalton into my life.

Why didn’t I know better? Why was my gut reaction to befriend a strange man and allow him into my life with hopes to help him instead of fearing him? I can’t get the thoughts outof my mind. I should’ve listened to Mason and not fallen for Dalton’s sob story and charm.

The internal battle keeps me awake at night until I cry myself to sleep. Then the next day comes, and the guilt returns, eating me whole as I try to push the demons away throughout the day.

“Soph? You awake?” Mason calls out, knocking on my door.

“Yeah, come in,” I say without turning around. His feet softly pad against the floor as he enters.

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