Page 146 of Between Regrets and Promises

Once he leaves with half the food, Mason comes and places a sweet kiss on my forehead. “I’ll junk punch him later for you.”

That causes me to chuckle, knowing he’ll do it for me. “That’s not necessary. I’m sure there’s a line of chicks he never called back who’d love to do it.”

“Why do you think he hardly ever brings women here anymore? They all knew where to find him, so he started hooking up at their place or in his truck. Finally got smart,” Mason says, laughing.

“Okay, so I’m never riding in his truck again.”

Mason and I fall into light conversation as we eat and things feel easy for a bit. He meant what he said last night about how he isn’t going to let me pull away as I drown in an ocean of guilt and pain. It means a lot that he’s willing to ride this out with me, but I wish I could give him more, give him what he deserves.

The tables have turned, and I want to be the very best version of me for his sake.

We spend the day lounging in the living room, watching Netflix and talking about everything and nothing at all. Neither of us brings up the elephant in the room, though there’s nothing more to say now that he knows I need some relationship distance. Mason was my friend beforehand, so it’s easy to be with him without it feeling awkward. That’s something I appreciate and don’t dare take for granted. He gives me space and doesn’t smother me, refusing to let it affect our friendship.

Liam comes and goes. He’s on his phone a lot, and sometimes he looks tense while other times he’s easygoing. It’s a little strange, but I’ve come to expect that from him. Being a bounty hunter means he could get a call at any time, day or night, and have to leave town at a moment’s notice.

After dinner is delivered, we eat while watching the final season ofLuciferuntil Lennon and Maddie come over. I’ve texted back and forth with them all week, but now that I’mback, they want to see me, which I understand. Mason gives us some privacy, but before he does, he bends down and kisses my forehead.

As soon as he’s upstairs and out of view, Lennon locks her gaze with mine. “What was that?”

“What?” I furrow my brows.

“Did you friend-zone him or something?”

“Because that looked like some brotherly shit,” Maddie adds.

I roll my eyes and ignore their glares. “I told him I needed a little space from the relationship thing right now, and he’s respecting that.”

“Oh, Soph. Why?” Lennon asks sadly. “He literally saved your life.”

“We’re still together,” I confirm. “But I can’t jump back into a full-on relationship until I work out all the chaos going on in my head.”

“Look, I can’t say I know exactly what you’re going through, but I can tell you leaning on Hunter during those hard months really helped me,” Lennon says.

“And I did lean on him after Weston, but this…” I shrug, feeling defeated. “I need to work through it. I want to be the girlfriend he deserves. All in. Not half a person. And right now, that’s how I feel.”

Lennon frowns but nods as if she finally understands. “Okay, I get it. But don’t let him get too far away. Don’t allow him to lose hope that you’ll ever come back to him. He’s so good for you. You’re good for him. You two are perfect for each other.”

“That’s the last thing I want, trust me.”

“Do you have a therapy appointment this week?” Maddie asks.

“Yeah, on Wednesday. The counselor in Utah set it up for me, and then I’ll make weekly appointments going forward,” I explain.

“I think it’ll help you a lot,” Lennon says. “Being pregnant with Allie helped me cope, knowing a piece of Brandon would be left in the world, but I probably should’ve gone at some point to work out my emotions.”

“I feel good about it already. I need to learn some tactics too so I’m not so damn trusting. It’s not the worst quality to have, but it’s come back to bite me in the ass twice now.” I shrug, trying to make light of the situation. “Oh, Mom and Dad told me to yell at both of you for not calling enough,” I add, changing the subject because I’m mentally drained from talking about me.

“They FaceTime me every day!” Lennon defends. “All they want to do is talk to Allie anyway.”

“I called them two weeks ago,” Maddie adds. “There’s literally nothing happening in my life besides having no job, no boyfriend, and going to class.”

“Oh, you poor thing,” I tease. “No drama. What that must be like…”

“Pfft. There’s plenty of drama with dancers. My roommate, Erin, and her frenemy Melanie, have it out weekly.”

“Sounds like a reality show.”

Maddie walks to the kitchen and helps herself to a diet soda before she returns. “How come no one told me college is basically high school with older, snotty girls?” She has a bag of pretzels with her too, which makes me laugh. She got lucky in the genetics department, but she works out every day. Eating a handful of those would cause me to bloat for two days.

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