Page 86 of Unbidden

She hesitates for a few minutes, wiping a tear from her eye.

“Once Father died, I tried to find her, but she was nowhere to be found. We couldn’t even find a trace of the last alias she used. I searched for months, but I didn’t find her. What I found was a foster child who resembled her. My niece.”

Her sad eyes meet mine. “I’m so sorry I didn’t get there sooner.”

“Getting there sooner wouldn’t have changed anything. I truly believe everything happens for a reason. I didn’t want my mom to die, but I know that if it was her time to go, then there was nothing anyone could do about it.” I pause. “You’re all here now. I know I’ve been difficult, but I’m willing to give this place a real shot if you guys are willing to give me one. I’m so tired of being on guard all the time.” I turn to Elijah. “I’m not looking for a father. I think the ship might’ve sailed on that, but I wouldn’t mind a friend.”

His sad smile almost makes me take back my words, but I hold firm. I don’t know if he can ever be my father, but I know I can be his friend.

“I would like that. Could we maybe have dinner once a week?”

I smile. “I think we can make arrangements for that.”

For once, I feel like things are falling into place.

-

I feel like a whole new woman. I know that sounds silly, but I really do. Now that I’ve let go of my preconceived notions about this life, things have been great.

My friends have been great as ever. Ingram has backed off ever since she was suspended for a week after our fight. Elijah and I have spent every Thursday evening having dinner together.

The only uncertain part of my life has been Reed. I’m still not sure how I should feel about him. He’s been kind and attentive to me for a while now, but I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. I guess when a friendship starts on such rocky ground like ours did, it’s hard to trust that he won’t revert back to who he was.

What are his true colors? Was he ever truly into me or was it another game?

Needless to say, things have been stilted with us. Some days he’s flirty while others he’s moody. But even when he’s moody, he still tries to go out of his way to hold my hand or kiss my cheek.

Alas, he hasn’t tried to take it any further, much to my lady parts’ dismay. Ever since Samhain, all I can think about is the way he touched me. The feelings he evoked inside me were unlike any others before. I can’t tell you how many nights I stayed up replaying that night, attempting to recreate the feelings in the comfort of my bed. All it ended up doing was leaving me feeling even more unsatisfied.

I want to ask him if we could do it again, but my pride won’t let me. Either that or fear of rejection. Hell, why not both? Either way, I’m stuck in the land of not knowing what’s going on but desperately wanting to.

“What are you thinking about?” Victoria’s voice startles me out of my thoughts.

I roll over on the bed to look at her. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Victoria sighs. “Reed?”

“I said I didn’t want to talk about it.” I bury my head in my pillow.

“We’re worried about you,” V tells me gently.

“Who is and why?”

“Tinsley and me, and because you’ve been distant!”

“I’ve been distant?” I ask, genuinely confused.

“Oh God, okay. One hundred percent no bullshitting, Sage, you’re closed off. You have walls built so high around you that we have no idea where you stand on anything. We thought we knew where your head was at, but now we have no idea. You’ve shut us out completely,” V tells me bluntly.

“Where I stand?”

“Are you still planning on leaving or not? We want you to stay, but we won't ask, but goddammit, we can’t take it anymore. We need to know what your plan is. Hell, Mom, Dad, and the rest of us are holding our breath waiting in fear of you not coming home. All you’re thinking about is yourself,” V says furiously.

Am I staying? Has leaving even crossed my mind for a while now?

“I think I’m going to stick around for a while,” I tell her honestly.

“Good,” V says, instantly relaxing.