Page 35 of Unpredictable

I don’t hesitate. I grab the keys to Dad’s car and head into the little town not far from here. I go to the only pharmacy in the town and pick up a couple cans of soup, knowing it will look suspicious if I don’t bring back something. I also grab cold medicine and tissues. Lastly, I grab five different pregnancy tests before heading to the cash register.

“Ah, a nasty cold, huh? It’s that time of year,” the young lady behind the counter muses. “You got the good stuff. The chunky chicken noodle. My favorite.” She pauses as she scans the pregnancy tests. “I hope you get the answer you’re looking for. I also hope you feel better soon.”

I finally meet her eyes, but there’s no pity in them. They hold understanding. Smiling at her, I pay for my items and head back to the cabin. I shove the tests in my purse before making my way into the house.

Mom pops her head from the kitchen as soon as the door shuts.

“Honey, are you feeling okay? Sage said you were sick.”

“I’m okay. I think it’s just a cold. Can you make me some soup?” I hold out the bag with the soup and medicine inside.

“Of course, baby.” She kisses my head before taking the soup out, handing the medicine back to me. “Go get comfy in bed. I’ll be right up with your soup.”

Hours later, while everyone is sleeping soundly, I pull out the tests and sneak into the shared bathroom between Sage and me. I know she’s not in her room, probably having snuck down to Reed’s room the moment she was sure Mom and Dad were knocked out, but I still lock the door. I pull out each test and reach the instructions, then proceed to pee on all five sticks.

As I wait, I think back to the lady at the store.

I hope you get the answer you’re looking for.

What am I looking for? Do I want to be pregnant?

Immediately, I think,No, I’m too young.

Then a small part of me says,But would it be the worst thing in the world?

The answer to that is also no. I would love to be a mother. I’m young and it would be hard, especially knowing Sterling most likely would be absent; however, it would be rewarding.

Deciding that no matter what I would be happy, I think about the repercussions of such a major life change. When my timer goes off, I quickly silence it. Taking a deep breath, I stand and look at the first test. Then the second. On and on until I get to the fifth.

Positive.

All five are positive.

I was going to be happy no matter what, right? Then why is there a brick lodged in my chest?

Why can’t I breathe?

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I’m fucking pregnant.

Shit.

Fuck.

My hands fly to my stomach as the profanities run through my mind.

Fu—no, fiddlesticks. I can’t curse anymore. I have a baby.

I have a baby.

A baby.

My mind runs wild before finally settling.

I’m having a baby.

“I’m having a baby,” I whisper out loud to myself. The resolution settles in me as the acceptance fills my blood. “I’m having a baby,” I say more confidently as I acknowledge the happiness finally shining through the panic.

Everything is going to be okay.

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